the way music can lose its shape

did you not see how I ran to you like
a humble servant, willing to feed
you my dreams, as my beating heart
lay on a silver platter?

my hands fed the lips of your soul
with glimpses of what we ‘could be’
and you lapped at them like a hungry dog
who lost his master long ago

out of my throat sang sacred words like
future
us
true love
and you strung them together like a
master carpet weaver, looping
full color & brilliance into the rug
where our dreams of a life together
lay in wait

but then you began to unravel
this grand tapestry
pulling at the threads with
impatience and selfishness
I so easily told you “I am sorry”
and took them into my own aching hands
for fear our dreams
may lose their shape

it was only after my bloody fingers
could no longer feel the strings
that pieced our fairy tale together
that I realized I was the master composer
and you were simply playing
your designated role in my tragedy

I was the writer of every joyous sound
and the lyrist of all our sad notes
because it was me, and only me,
that sang the tales of forever regarding
your heart and mine
and it was me who created the fantasy
in order for it to fall apart

so with numb fingers and
the curtain falling to the floor
I say we have played this song long enough
the threads are bare and frayed
we have paid the price, my carpet weaver

breathe with me one last time
and let it all go
to begin living again
in our own separate realities

a spinner of threads
and a grand musician
producing their own creations
in harmony with the needs of their own self

rather than fumbling and failing
in a trade
they do not belong

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the way music can lose its shape by 


the fat lady has sang.

I am a dreamer, artist, and mother. I dance in the rain, spend too much time reading books, and live for my family. I am a gypsy, poet, musician, and artist. But most of all, I am a butterfly fairy. Come dream with me.

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Comments

  • HamperRefuser
    HamperRefuserover 3 years ago

    Wow Shadow… This is fantastic… Really strong

  • Thank you sweetie.. your support of my scribblings is always so appreciated.. xx

    – ShadowDancer

  • Arcadia Tempest
    Arcadia Tempestover 3 years ago

    Oh your metaphorical word crafting PJ is absolutely brilliant in this. The end of anything leaves threads in us and to tie them off and pull out like manna new threads is not always an easy task.
    But you here suggest with such eloquence that it is indeed so very possible.
    The whole flow of this poetical prose was epically beautiful…xxx

  • OH sweet KarenSue.. you are such a magnificent rock of a soul.. sharing my life journey with you on this bubble world anchors my flighty heart in a way you’ll never know.. i love you truly.. xxx

    – ShadowDancer

  • msdebbie
    msdebbieover 3 years ago

    This has a lot of dignity in its raw truthfulness.
    I really like the sense of hope despite the loss and heartbreak.
    Beautiful writing PJ xxx

  • thank you for saying that deb.. it’s so nice to hear that it can be felt as dignified and not necessarily over-dramatic.. sometimes miss hope hides and we have to write about her in order to have something to climb onto so we can build it in our minds for real.. love you xxx

    – ShadowDancer

  • linaji
    linajiover 3 years ago

    I can feel this one my dearest.. .you go and get it going… your word smithery is fantastic!! LOVE YOU!

  • cutting my veins open these days, darling.. LOVE YOU more. Wondering if we can plan a visit to KC…. … ….. would love to have you some more.

    – ShadowDancer

  • journey360
    journey360over 3 years ago

    Very nice poem

  • thank you journey

    – ShadowDancer

  • amanda marx
    amanda marxover 3 years ago

    lovely work . . . i look forward to many more reads . . .

  • thank you amanda.. i look forward to seeing you more often as well

    – ShadowDancer

  • linaji
    linajiover 3 years ago


    JULY 2011

  • this warms my soul

    – ShadowDancer

  • ClaireJane
    ClaireJaneover 3 years ago

    How fragile we really are. How painful the truth of reality. Great share. Big hugs and congrats on your well-earned feature. xx

  • fragile indeed, sister jane… in the end, everything turns to dust, does it not? thank you so much as always. xx

    – ShadowDancer

  • LisaMM
    LisaMMover 3 years ago

    Raw honesty expressing very real pain and sorrow. A very brave, beautiful and powerful write ShadowDancer. To face such a reality and find the innner strength to let go and move on takes so much courage and the deepest kind of love there is….the love of one self. To stop the suffering and release your heart from such pain. Beautiful poetry….really made me reflect. Thank you. :-) xxxx Love and hugs to you xoxoxo

  • oh Lisa, you nailed it.. there comes a point we have to love ourselves enough to get out of the hole we put ourselves in.. thank you for putting so much thought into the feelings behind my words… xxx

    – ShadowDancer

  • Anna S.
    Anna S.over 3 years ago

    Moving and how true sometimes……xxx

  • thank you anyar.. too often true for someone.. somewhere..

    – ShadowDancer

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