A new year sparks hope for change and a better year than the last. Some resolve to overcome bad habits, make a career change, lose weight, quit smoking, end a relationship that no longer fits, or attract a new one. The possibilities and desire for change are endless. Whatever your resolution for the New Year… change isn’t possible unless your thinking supports it.
If one approaches the concept of change by attempting to change others or attempting to change things and circumstances beyond one’s control… not much can change and it’s more than likely that 2010 won’t look much different than the years before it. If your happy life is dependent on someone else doing “it” differently to satisfy you and your agenda, brace yourself for less than satisfactory results. If change means manipulation of others to get them to give you what you want, expect to feel separate from yourself and the world around you. The result is loneliness, stress and suffering. Manipulation and control aren’t very attractive qualities… have you noticed? Instead, we repel what we’re hoping to attract.
Change is an inside job, not an outside one. Reality is always internal no matter what’s taking place externally. Whatever we think becomes our reality, so make sure that your thinking doesn’t serve to limit and sabotage your good intentions.
Here are some suggestions for creating an unforgettable 2010:
1 Remember, life is happening in THIS moment, not in past moments that can’t be changed or in future moments that aren’t yet realized. The wonderful thing about the past is that it’s OVER unless your thinking keeps it alive. Life is happening in this moment. If you live in the past or the unknown future, you’re unconscious to what’s unfolding NOW. It’s what we invest in today that will create our garden of tomorrow. If there are too many weeds in your garden, they’ll choke out the flowers.
2 The key to happiness is in SELF REALIZATION. If you’re OTHER REALIZED; PAST REALIZED or FUTURE REALIZED, the coming year will likely be a year out of balance inside and outside. Remember, there are only 3 kinds of business in the Universe. MY business; YOUR business and GOD’S business. When I leave my business to be in YOURS or GOD’S, I’ve abandoned myself and there’s no one here taking care of my business. I experience loneliness, separation and war with you. I don’t notice my own arrogance believing that I know how you should be living your life.
If something or someone doesn’t fit me, it’s my job to choose change for MYSELF. It’s not my job to impose my belief system and agenda on you. It’s not my job to change YOU… that would be your job and only if you choose and according to YOUR measure… not mine. We fit until we don’t… end of story. If you feel stressed, anxious, angry, sad… ask yourself who’s business you’re in. Notice that your suffering happens every time you leave your business to be in theirs.
3 Don’t get ahead of your own evolution… and don’t expect others too either. Don’t expect others to understand what they don’t. Can you understand what you don’t? Understanding comes when it does and not a moment sooner. Evolution can’t be controlled or manipulated… it happens as it does.
4 Notice the meaning(s) that your mind attaches to people, places, things and events. Don’t confuse these meanings with literal truth. It may be your truth and that doesn’t make it true for all. Allow others to believe what they do without needing to change their minds to look like yours.
5 Don’t blindly believe what you think. Question thoughts that cause you stress, anxiety, separation from self, others and opportunity.
6 Don’t forget how truly amazing and brilliant you are… unless you THINK you’re not. You are whatever you think you are. If you can’t see your brilliance, it’s your thinking that’s creating the darkness. Nothing else is possible.
7 We love who we love and there’s nothing we can do about it… and that doesn’t mean we can stay together. We don’t love who we don’t love and there’s nothing we can do about it. It is what it is.
8 Don’t expect others to do for you that which you aren’t willing to do for yourself. For example: “You should love me!” What’s truer is “I should love me!” or “I should love you!” How loving am I when I try to dictate to you who you should or shouldn’t love? Without self love, we don’t have a frame of reference for love… we don’t know what it is. We feel empty and needy as we keep looking outside ourselves for something that can only be found and expanded from the inside out. Fall in love with self and everyone else will too!
As you embrace a brand new year, notice your thinking. Does it support the success and evolution of YOU (according to YOUR measure)? If not… you might be tempted to simply change your mind!