I saw you standing there.. having that midlife crisis.. and I felt really bad for you. When you mentioned that you were thinking of getting a tattoo, I could tell right away it was going to be a dolphin.
So here, please take this teeshirt instead. Wear it, hug it, stroke it, even chew on its corners for a while if you need to, while you get through this tough time.
Honestly it’s going to be better than the f%^king shit tattoo you were thinking of getting !!!!!!
…by the way, please don’t wear this out in public, it’s only slightly better looking than the tattoo would have been…
image notes: created using gimp.