My Son

RebeccaWeston
Author: RebeccaWeston
Word Count: 195
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Do you think I won’t hurt, when I hear his name?
Do you think I can stand to see you in such pain?
Only here a little while, but only you should feel -
the anguish and the moaning? – NO! mine is very real!!
He was our baby boy, born to ME and YOU
Lived a tiny life, with fingers and toes brand new
I hate to see you cry and I can’t stop your tears
but can you understand, how much a father fears?
I should be strong for you and help the hurt to go
But how can I be strong, when I am hurting so
I carried his tiny coffin as through he were asleep
Saw the mourner’s faces – they could watch and weep
I had to hold it in, to be everybody’s rock
Not really being strong, I was in state of shock
And when they had all gone, there was only you and I
Trying to console you, my tears, I’d quickly dry
Waiting to be alone, and you had ceased to weep
Then I could sit and cry, for my son who went to sleep

© RebeccaWeston 2009

  • Michael Scholl

    Michael Scholl

    such a sad sad story. Wow.

  • RebeccaWeston replied

    Hi Mike – yes it is sad.
    My son lost his baby boy when he in his early 20’s. He had to cope with the baby’s illness, operations and finally his death and I saw that the people around him tended to forget his heartbreak, as happens to men sometimes. XX

  • Renate Dartois

    Renate Dartois

    This is a heart wrenching poem I can imagine the pain of your son I never forget a night 30 years ago when we almost lost our than baby boy.

  • RebeccaWeston replied

    It must have been terrible for you. You never forget those moments and it makes things all the the more precious when you lose a child. Thanks Renate XX

  • Sally Omar

    Sally Omar

    OMG….Very sad…so sorry for your family’s loss….men are always expected to be the rocks
    of the family…as was your son…..but they hurt and this type of hurt subsides but never goes away!!!! xoxoxoxoxox

  • RebeccaWeston replied

    Yes – I watched everyone almost pass him by when they were handing out the love and sympathy.
    He is moving on but it’s always difficult. Thank you Sally XX

  • Patricia Anne McCarty

    Patricia Anne ...

  • RebeccaWeston replied

    Thank you very much – I’m very pleased X

  • rubyjo

    rubyjo

    whoa, this is intense. thre father is often overlooked in these sad events. well done.

  • RebeccaWeston replied

    Thank you very much XX

  • Solar Zorra

    Solar Zorra

    This was very well written. My son’s wife recently decided to leave him and take their daughter to the other side of the country. She’s three, and he weeps uncontrollably for her. She’s not dead, but everyone expects him to suck it up, be strong. It’s so difficult to see our sons in so much pain. I so feel for you and your son. SZ

  • RebeccaWeston replied

    Oh, I’m sorry for your son’s loss – it is so sad and yes, men don’t feel like a mother does, men should just shoulder it and get on without feeling the loss, that’s what most people think. But when a child is removed to so far away or dies, it is a great loss and men do feel in exactly the same way. Sometimes I think it’s worse because they have to mourn in silence because they know people will not understand it. Please give your son my love and good wishes. Thank you XX

  • silverstrummer - David Everitt

    silverstrummer...

    Oh dear Rebecca my sincere condolences to you, your son and families. Such heartbreak when there should be so much Joy.
    My partner lost a daughter 2 1/2 years of age 30 years ago and she still sobs even today. Men have always had to keep their emotions down as we shouldn’t cry and show compassion. Todays men are changing and its ok that guys cry now! I cry too much sometimes but hey if its there cry but my thoughts are with you all. – David

  • RebeccaWeston replied

    Thank you for your kind words David. Yes, it is lucky that the world is finally ‘allowing’ for men to feel sorrow and react as women always have. Bless you XX

  • Leda D

    Leda D

    oh my, this bought on goosebumps and tears. what a heartbreaking thing to experiences, such a beautiful piece. xox

  • RebeccaWeston replied

    Thanks, it was a terrible time for him but he was a brick, bless him XX
    Becca

  • colorblind

    colorblind

    the emotions that you deliver
    are felt on so many levels
    lovely

  • RebeccaWeston replied

    Thank you – this is one that I was telling from the outside looking in and not from the inside !!
    Becca

  • jacqleen

    jacqleen

    Sorry….......but I just can’t comment on this….......NOT YET….i’m too busy crying :((((((( but know I Lv U! xx

  • RebeccaWeston replied

    Please don’t cry – I can’t stay with you tonight !!! I only have limited time - big {{{{{{HUG}}}}} there, there, all better now xxx

  • skinnyman

    skinnyman

    beautiful, it brings back memories of holding onto something in grief , trying to be strong. thank you.

  • RebeccaWeston replied

    Thank you – I hope that you are ok now {{hug}} XXX

  • skinnyman

    skinnyman

    sniff, i’ll be ok in a minute. x

  • RebeccaWeston replied

    Oh no, please don’t get upset !!! thanks {{hug}} for you too!! X

  • happyfeet5

    happyfeet5

    I am so sorry for your son’s loss. It was your loss too. And you suffered double. You suffered for your son and for your grandson. This is so emotional, that I am crying. I really felt this in my heart. I felt I had lost a son. I wish I could say something to console you, but I know there are no words that will alleviate this kind of pain. The only thing that will help is to know that others care. Even the words are beautiful, I can’t say that. I only can say that since it came from the heart, it was soul felt.

  • RebeccaWeston replied

    Thank you so very much for your lovely words. With wonderful caring people like yourself in the world, it’s much easier to ‘heal’. I thank you with all my heart.
    Becca

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