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THE DUDE

I went to get a patent
On an invention I called the Dude.
It was a nipple extender
In a masculine bra so shrewd.

It had a pair of cups attached
And two straws for baby’s mouth.
This would allow for any dad
To give momma a girls night out.

A little girl with a lemonade stand
Was set up beside my house.
I asked to share her table
To sell this man made blouse.

The little girl said “that’s o.k.”
So I set up with her right there,
With a sign saying nipple extenders-lemonade
And that sure got folks to stare.

A couple of dancers from a Tampa club
Came by and drank ten cups.
One of them said “I have to pee
So that should be enough.”

A week went by still hard at work,
Those two ladies returned to say,
“Listen you two that that juice doesn’t work,
Return our money to us today!”

I asked them what the problem was
And they said it was their chest.
I said here take these two contraptions,
For you two boobs it will work best.

THE DUDE

Robert Burns

New Port Richey, United States

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