Right from my childhood the language teachers relished giving me tortures of every sort. The different ones were standing hands up in the class, then making me look like a cock, forcing me to sit with boys. I use to avoid. But their favourite was to make me stand outside the classroom. But then the tnought of Ibsen’s words “The strongest man in the world is he who stands mostalon,” gave me strength to face the laughing classmates. English for me soon became a third degree torture just like the one given to a prisoner and was at the top of my hitlist though it is undoubtedly the most widely used language in the history of the earth and has the largest vocabulary. Let’s face the truth I’ve been tolerating since years. English is an language. I say so because there nor apple in a pineapple and no ham in hamburger.Since childhood,the pronunciation of ‘do’ and ‘go’ has been troubling me. If the teacher taught, why is n’t it true preacher praught? If a vegetarian eats veg, then what does a humanitarian eat? Sometimes I wonder if all the English speaker could be packed off to an asylum for the vertebrally insane. In what other language do people recite a play and play a rceital,have noses that run and feet that smell, which is not a blacksmith black in colour,where ‘K’ goes we pronounce know,knock,etc. Why the people are scared of Pneumonia(they pronounce it as Neemonia) that they leave ‘P’ aside. Lot more such things made me think that this language is meant for maniacs only.Translating this language is also not an easy job. We say in hindi”HAWA KAR RAHA HAI”. Does this mean ,”He is doing air”? If someone’s jealous then he/she is burning from me. If in my class,my two classmates were playing with each other sometimes running after one another, hitting chalks etc. When the girl said,”CHALK KYON MAAR RAHA HAI?” Now does this mean,”Why are you killing chalk?” The list is endless. Coming to politics,if pro and on are opposites,is congress opposite of progress?English is a funny language. But I know that english is important too… This was my problem,but I pray that everything is fine with you.