Sir Cal of the Dale written for my Son Calvin aged 12 – first job – paperboy
Arise arise Sir Cal of the Dale
Your stead awaits go find your trail
Where there are demons, dragons and vicious crocs
But victory draws closer with each letter box
Peering out of the window a garden of frost
Looking into the distance I start to get lost
My pyjamas fade and armour appears
The finest Camelot has seen in years
I clunk downstairs, I mustn’t wake my wee brother
It’s hard not to stir my bat-sensed mother.
I make it outside and open the shed
And where my bike once stood, appears a white head
Her mane is long and covers her eyes
The door swings open, she steps outside
Adjusting the saddle on a box I must climb
Sometimes I wish I wasn’t five foot five!
But King Arthur knows I’m just the right height,
For I am Sir Cal of the Dale, the bravest knight.
I ride to the shop in a gentle trot,
Can’t be too careful so on goes my lock.
The papers collected my mission it seems
Is to deliver the papers whilst everyone dreams.
So off we race to the battle ahead,
And to think I was going to stay in my bed.
At the foot of the road the houses all stare,
At the brave young knight with the warrior glare.
Jump over the fence to Number 14,
I love this first house as his car’s always clean.
Across to 15 then back to 4
Two more doors then I drop to the floor.
The house at the end, with old garden chairs,
Only I know it’s the dragon’s lair.
I’m usually quiet and really quick,
But today I’ve had no breakfast and am feeling stiff.
If I go too slow he’ll get me for sure,
Eighteen steps from the gate to the door.
I check my armour and sword, I can’t fail,
I vault the fence clutching The Daily Mail.
In 4 seconds flat I’m at the door…almost done,
When…Oh no, this house has ordered The Sun!
A cold sweat breaks, my palms are all sticky,
Coz if the dragon sees me it’s gonna get tricky.
Then I notice my companion starting to tense,
The in one bound, she’s over the fence.
She gallops so fast, it’s clear she’s no nag,
What’s more…she’s got the paper bag!
Mail goes in and out comes the Sun,
Through the letter box it goes, and that’s us all done.
With all that excitement my face is a glow,
But riding home slowly my heart starts to slow.
The bumpy ride starts to get calmer,
Wheels replace hooves, clothes replace Armour.
Getting up at six is par for the course
For a paper boy Knight and his silver horse.