DATE: Fri 15th March 2013
MEDIUM: Black biro pen/A5 sketchbook
TIME: 1/2 an hour
DESCRIPTION: Self-portrait done standing up straight in front of the bedroom vertical mirror.
FULL SIZE VERSION, HERE
This is the ‘close up’ version I uploaded; without the date/signature having been included.
As you can see, I went in far too dark on the inside topmost part of the ‘left’ ear; unfortunately, you cannot erase what happens to be ‘indelible’ ink; thus, when using pen…you have no other choice but to go live with every single mistake!
Also, if you look very closely in between both the forehead/hair; you can see the horizontal line which indicates the top of the ‘egg shape’ outline that I used to originally form the drawing on. I guess, in order for that line to disappear; I need to use pencil/rubber; or else, draw it in very lightly, indeed; so that when I go over it…it simply vanishes all on it’s own.
NOT PHOTO REALISTIC; AS I’M ALWAYS HOPING…?!
I still don’t like the work, overall; what I most hate about it is…it still looks very much like being a ‘drawing’; and, so, NOT ‘real’; how much I long to be able to draw ‘photo-realistically’; at least, once, in my lifetime…so that I can prove to myself that, yes, I CAN do it; otherwise, my ever reaching that ultimate end goal just seems more like being a total ‘dream’…?!
AM I AN ARTIST, YET? NO!
Man, whenever I compare myself with what other artists have done; such as those whose brilliant ‘master’ works I see on RedBubble; then, I say to myself ‘what the hell am I doing here for?!’ They are so many MILLIONS times better than I am; that I just don’t ever see myself as being able to reach their ability level; might as well quit! But, then, I just tell myself, no; that’s not the way to go; I do art…not necessarily with the single aim of achieving possible ‘perfection’; but, instead, I mainly tend to do it, quite simply, because I ENJOY doing it; I need to be able to express myself; and, art is all about giving one an outlet for self-expression; that’s the real reason why I continue to exist here while being in pure ‘amateur’ mode.