Being a GIT.
Being a GIT. belongs to the following groups:
All Things Poetic, Artistic, PhilosophicalHi everyone. Not posted for a long while. There are a bunch of reasons for this and I am pretty sure that they are unlike any guesses folks have posited, if posit they have.
First off, I would like to apologise for the “Comments that PISS ME OFF” post. I was wrong. I was behaving like a spoiled child. Immature, puerile. Bitter.
The comment that pissed me off so much was a compliment that I should have been decent enough to accept and be proud to have received. Responding in such a way is something I am ashamed of. I was wrong.
That this post was received with such good grace and commentary by those that took the time to read it honours me, certainly far more than I deserve in this instance. I worked out that I had made a colossal mistake about a week after I had posted. I haven’t dared to read further comments on something I feel such shame over since then. I will, after I write this.
I have been suffering from chronic pain. It was occluding my senses and self. It continues to do so.
HeatherTS
what really matters is that you acknowledged it…which kicks ass, just remove it and be done with it…that is my suggestion.
hope you feel better lately, today has been one of those days for me as well, though my shit is emotional, instead of physical. treat yourself well today Paul…
Judi Taylor
You are a better person than you believe yourself to be. It is not easy to admit ones faults. Take care of yourself and be gentle with yourself. We are all in this together. :)
Samuel Durkin
Seeing a mistake is a useful and good thing. it’s takes an even better person to admit it.
It can be hard to when and how to regulate reactions to things. Sometimes I imagine everything I do is not only great, but pure genius. Then the next day I think what you made wasn’t as great as I imagined and maybe I’m not an artist at all, just wasting my time and I want to destroy all my paintings. Then another day it seems like I see criticism in what ever anyone says about my art and it makes me annoyed.
Jacqueline Baker
Awwww at least you are man enough to say so and that gets respect…..people love, respect and deeply admire you and your work more than you realise!! I guess the hardest thing now will be to forgive yourself, i’m still learning that one with my past so i know how hard it can be. You’ve been humble enough to say sorry and that wipes the slate clean so dust yourself down and get on with producing that brilliant art that only you can do!!
Shanina Conway
Hugs Paul, chronic pain can easily heighten reactions and I’m sure everyone is aware of the pain you face daily…I’m just glad to see you back and look forward to seeing more of your brilliant work;)
rightasrain
Pain is the pits, Paul. People will understand that that influences a lot we do. Take care :-)
Carson Collins
You were being honest,. A little bit of over-reaction is worth a lot more than a ton of pointless politeness. Continue to be raw, and honest. You’re the real thing. Celebrate the time that you have left. Let the observers sort it out after we’re gone.
We have such a short time left on this planet, my dear friend.Don’t let us regret one second of it in doubts or self-recriminations. Be proud of what you are. Don’t ever apologize.
A hundred years from now, people will see your paintings, and read your writing, and see you for the magnificent thing that you are.
Until then, give it a rest,.
Your biggest fan,
CC
pauldrobertson replied
ah and i think that you are my true friend, and we are and have a commonality linking us carson – this brevity is universal but a deep understanding of it and the courage to understand when we are and where we are.
your comments on my last post made me cry. this is a wonderful thing.
i have so little time now. i sleep so much and my hands have been crippled by pain. it is hard to think clearly and almost impossible to work.
i will write about that too, i want to, i just have so little time!! steals away from me like a shallow pool in a desert sun; like a BASTARD!
thank you. as always.
Tony Ryan
Hi Paul,
I have always valued your honesty and would continue to encourage you to freely speak your mind. Further if you do feel like you have lost control then embrace why you have lost control rather than resist it by carrying guilt. I believe that people who feel life more deeply do have much more to handle. However once again this ability to feel is a gift if we understand what we are taking in and giving out.
Best Wishes Tony.
pauldrobertson replied
i needed to write about it to free myself and to come back. i don’t feel guilty, STUPID, yeah, guilt is foolish.
it IS a gift, i know… the curse side of the gift has been a little heavy lately…
thanks as always, for your support my good friend.
missmoneypenny
We can all sympathise and say we know how you feel but nobody ever really knows the pain another person is suffering – all I can say is thank you for your honesty and I wish you well
Suzanne German
Paul – very big of you to right this….great that you can see the other point of view and not feel insulted if it wasn’t meant that way. :)