Don't Know Anymore

Don’t Know Anymore

I don’t really know who I am anymore since I lost my face in the mirror.
There seems to be an image resembling me, but I not sure that it is.
Features that made the outline of who I was are not as visible as before.
Perhaps the shadows that formed along the way have shaded the darkness.

Sometimes I see a refection of myself on the shiny paint on the car I drive,
I wonder if it is the person I once knew before, or if it is the person I am today.
There is no way I could be two persons at once and so I am a little confused,
And I don’t know if I hate either one of the persons that might resemble me.

When the sun is out I notice a dark shadow that seems to follow me everywhere,
I stared to see if I knew him and even though it looked familiar, I still wondered.
At times I hear myself talking to the reflections and shadows while I am alone,
There never seems like anyone is around to hear me weep or cry out loud.

As I was window shopping yesterday I saw someone starring right back at me,
He was standing right in front of me and moved with me on every step I made.
I waved at the glass and I noticed that he had the same clothing I had on,
Then I smiled and so did he as I walked away and then we both disappeared.

As it started to rain I hurried to find a place to stay dry and I came upon a tree,
Down below the branches a pond appeared and I saw the person I knew once.
His face was blurry as the raindrops fell onto the pond as I saw his glare,
When I splashed my shoe I moved the water and the image became distorted.

I walked away after the rain stopped as the wind begun to blow as I heard voices,
They whispered into my ears to look down at the formation of a colored rainbow.
It was a beautiful creation and I saw myself in living color as I starred at me,
And by the time I got home the image implanted inside my head was my shadow.

Copyright © Oscarelizondo Tuesday February 02, 2010 11:09 AM

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A lonely man has been suffering for a while until he ventures out to find himself. When a raindow appears his mind finds a new prospective to continue living.

Comments

  • Misunderstood24
    Misunderstood24almost 5 years ago

    I know that your writing is amazing.
    I know that you are my friend.
    I know that this is a very good piece.=)

  • Thank you my friend, you are my friend, will always be wheather we are silent, or we are communicating. You have that gift for writing too, and even if I find myself troubled and unable to return a comment, remember that I did find time to read your talented work. I thank you for listening to my emotions, but also for expressing yours, keeps writing, we are listening.

    – oscarelizondo

  • linmarie
    linmariealmost 5 years ago

    Images change with raindrops on the pond
    The sound rain brings can be a calm
    Reflections in glass or paint
    Are also distorted, show us no grace

    So it is the reflections of our soul
    That keep us youthful and beautiful
    But it is sometimes hard to see
    Because it lies deep down inside
    Where light and reflections can not seep in.

    Rainbows excite our eyes with color
    Sunshine warms our face when looking too its rays
    Shadows do imitate our outer shape
    Pay the shadows no mind,, or your soul they will take

    Always listen too the rain drops fall
    Smile at the rainbow when in your sight
    Kiss the sunshine for the warmth it gives
    Reflections of us are hidden deep inside.

    this is my response to a wonderful write about self reflection,, your words inspired more words in this eternity of expectation, peace and love linmarie
  • You are so talented, I just responded to one of your writes and when I was about to walk away, there you are again with this beautiful writing. You have no idea how much this means to me and what it brings to my heart. This writing says it all, your gifted mind speaks with a heart, and I thank you for sharing this and I hope you put it out there for others to read. Yes, someday maybe we shall write a book, but if we don’t, our minds will feel as though they did because we have many things in common and we shall remember that for the rest of our lives. You make me smile, and like I stated before, I will be silent for a little while, I will collect myself, I have many writing that I want to put out, but I must allow others to share their too. So, I’ll speak to you later, I shall be back after midnight, my soul will be out searching, tomorrow who knows, maybe I will be refreshed and ready, if not wait patiently, I shall return.

    – oscarelizondo

  • linmarie
    linmariealmost 5 years ago

    please my friend go out with the wind,, keep your eyes set on the journey, ears tuned into the sounds all around, nose to the fragrance of the wind blowing the scent of pine, the seashore , the moss wherever you venture,, I will stay busy, but with anticipation of hearing from you with new inspirations of your cleansing ..and your excitement to share it all with us,, peace and love linmarie

  • I hope you continue putting the pen to the stories your mom allows you to write, she is marvelous in her own way and I am thankful that she shares these moments and allows you to write them down, even if the names and places change to protect those involved. I tip my hat to you and her alike, two of a kind, lovely ladies, rich in family, proud in honor, devoted in true hearts and just great people to know. At least we we communicate through our stories, poems and photos, and I am still worried about my song, didn’t and don’t want to keep you from writing, so just put my song on the back burner, you just keep being yourself, and move on. Thanks for this wonderful writing and sorry about the things that happened to her, I have very similar stories to tell about my mom. Are we reading the same book and on the same page, wow, .

    – oscarelizondo

  • linskudd
    linskuddalmost 5 years ago

    As the saying goes – may the gentle wind be at your back guiding you gentle through this life, may the soft rain feed your thoughts, and may the sun keep you warm and protected on your journey.
    I often read your writings but don’t often respond – sorry. Writing is a gift – and my scribblings are mere scratching in the dust.

  • Thank you so much, and I understand about not reponding, we all think our writing are not good enough, I was there when I first started. With time, with wonderful people as yourself encouraging us by knowing you have read them, makes me brave and we continue to better ourselves. Don’t be shy, some will say things that might offend us, but we get better by it. Again, I was there many moons ago, I told myself I would improve, and now look at how your are commenting me, that could be you I would be commenting someday too, Feel good about yourself, not all comments will be bad, I know I would read yours and help you get better, well, that’s just me. I thank you so much for your honesty, for stopping by to comment, even a few words is always good, and for taking the time to read my emotions. Always here to encourage you too, and help anytime. Thank you.

    – oscarelizondo

  • linskudd
    linskuddalmost 5 years ago

    Thank you for your response. I DO try and write – and after many re-writes I occasionally come up with something I think ok. But, I must admit I tend to get waylaid by other things – and this wandering off can last for months & even years. ;o)

  • boswell20
    boswell20almost 5 years ago

    another amazing write oscare…compelling and fierce…great job

  • Thank you, I’ve reading yours, but I wasn’t sure if you rememered me, I should have commented on your wonderful talented work, but I am honest, I didn’t at the time, however, it does not take away from your talents. I will be more careful next time, thank you so much for your wonderful comments, you will hear from me later.

    – oscarelizondo

  • Kelelina
    Kelelinaalmost 5 years ago

    Awwww…. I been missing you Oscar! Hope all is well with you! Love this write as I love all of your writes!! Sorry I havent been around much but you are one person that could never leave our hearts!! :) You have a great soul! Hugs to you!! xx :)

  • I have busy doing nothing, just walking around getting a feel for what is out, what I have missed for the last few years. My youngest finally got married and so many things to take care of now that my wife is gone. Things are a little bit touchy right now with all of that, and I have been lonely as usual, so I have been doing some heavy thinking. I am putting everything in order, slowly, and I hope I make it through these moments of my life. Thank you for reading, I have been more of a silent person, I’ve been writing, but keeping more tomyself if you know what I mean. However, I miss you too, I have read your writing, seen your pictures of you and your friends, but I have been silent. I’ll wait up and comment in the morning when my head is clear. Just got back about thirty minutes ago and I’m catching up to everything. Thank you, you’ll be hearing from me more.

    – oscarelizondo

  • wigs
    wigsalmost 5 years ago

    incredible reflective write Oscar…… I can see you are pulling through with the positive ending… hugs my friend x

  • Yes, pull and push through the hard times, I’ve done well to make it this far and I plan to continue getting stronger everyday. Thank you for such wonderful comments.

    – oscarelizondo

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