Doug Greenwald

Having you in my life

...I am strong.

...I am loved.

...I am cherished.

...My heart is strengthened.

...My soul is comforted.

...My spirit is at peace.

...I know joy.

..…

About a week ago, while listening to It’s Been Awhile by Staind a three line verse jumped out at me:

Why must I feel this way
Please make this go away
Just one more peaceful day

and…

Know

...that I have given my heart to you.

...that my soul is your refuge.

...that your voice brings me joy.

...that your love brings me comfort.

...that your happiness m…

In the last two days I have read two writings that deal with the damage that control in a relationship brings. And it made me reflect on my own issues with control.

I work with computers. …

Every morning I wake up without you, and…

My hands long to brush the hair from your face.

My eyes long to look into yours.

My body longs to feel you against me.

My lips long to…

I don’t know how I can miss someone that I have not yet met.
But I do.

I don’t know how I can miss seeing eyes that have never seen me.
But I do.

I don’t know how I can miss the shine o…

I find myself thinking about what I look forward to when I am finally with the woman to whom I have given my heart and who calms my soul.

I can feel this peace and joy settling over me, covering me completely with an almost physical weight.

This month last year started my late wife’s downward spiral that completed the destruction of our marriage and led to her death.

I was honored beyond words. It even took me a couple of days to realize that it meant giving a speech. In front of a room full of people :)

Several incidents of felony speeding later I’m at her apartment. Fire and police are already there, talking to the ex.

It’s best to just leave me be when it happens although both wives have thrown Midol at me during these times, generally from a safe distance.

I suppose I should be glad that I’m an E-ticket. But it hurt.

It’s been so long that I’ve been in a good mood it took me 2 days to figure out what it was :)

In five years I will:

– own 10-15 acres in the middle of beautiful nowhere with a 4 stall barn and do horse rescue.

– have relearned to maintain a healthy lifestyle and will be sustaini…

Long, sleepless night last night. I spent some time starting to unbuild the fantasies I have constructed to replace happiness. Their appeal was becoming too strong.

Since I was up, I decid…

I can explain how mom ended up in the pit where the demon waits. I can explain exactly how the demon took hold.

I thought about taking her back home to meet my parents and my second family. Mostly I thought about that smile.

Mostly what I want you to know is how wonderful it is to see you. You are the answer to a prayer.

Divorce starts, generally, well before the legal proceedings. It starts with the emotional death of at least one of the spouses.

My current divorce started 3 weeks before I asked my wife to…