Strange are the things dreams are made of,
some too frightening and fearsome,
some just bewildering, but just as much frightening
like this one…
I went out on the deck, it was an upper deck, to lean on the railing,
watching below the children playing in the crystalline pool with their parents and other adults lounging around it, talking and sunning, not paying much attention to the kids splashing, floating, being kids in their raucous behavior, when I saw that they brought two cats into the pool, one was on a raft and close enough to the edge it jumped but missed.
The other cat I saw go under.
It was then I reacted and ran down the steps and jumped into the pool.
Everyone looked at me in amazement, as I yelled to them the kids brought cats in the water. One of them pointed, indicating the cat running away from the pool, soaked, but free.
Another chastised me for panicking and scaring the children.
As I got out of the pool I spoke in a downtrodden voice that cats do not like being in water at the same time one of the women made her way out of the water holding the other drowned cat. She was furious at her kids, yelling at them, weeping mad.
I made it back up the wooden steps just barely, reaching the deck, shaking, collapsing onto the wooden chaise lounge. I covered myself with a towel and continued shaking, but not a shiver from being in the water, more like an epileptic fit, but, I knew it wasn’t that.
Suddenly, a little girl jumped on me. I didn’t recognize her, but as she soon as she landed on me she lost her balance and began to slip off and over the decking, I managed weakly to grasp onto her to keep her from falling.
Another man, with his young daughter occupied the deck chair beside where I was, holding onto that little girl for dear life. I didn’t believe he did not see what was happening, he seemed totally oblivious. Him or his child.
Meanwhile, I am trying to speak, but hardly a sound, my vocal chords tightened and I could only speak in broken whispers. I was still shaking and panting out a word or two beneath audible volume still for someone to help me. What seemed like hours, a woman appeared, grabbed hold of the child just as I was losing my grip.
The woman realized there was something wrong with me and yelled for someone to call an ambulance. She kissed me on the forehead and thanked me for saving her child from falling.
When I woke up, I was shaking and disoriented, completely out of sorts, my insides felt like jello. I sat up and tried to calm myself by breathing deeply a few times. I held my head in my hands and wished for a soda and a cigarette, but, I knew those would only add to my unsettled mind, my nervous body.
I seldom recall my dreams so vividly, but, when I do, they are always like omens or some kind of warning…I put it down to some subconscious fear and would try to reason it out.
But, reason loses meaning when dreams spill over into reality.
I wonder sometimes if they aren’t a reflection of some psychosis. I fear for my sanity.
I remember a dream I had of meeting some girl, hearing her name and knowing what she looked like. A year later I met that very same girl.
Some dreams occur in chapters as that one did.
I decided I should lay down again, but not fall asleep, my head was reeling.
I dared not close my eyes and instead focused on the ceiling. I felt like I was on drugs, but I hadn’t done anything like that for years.
It was when the sun poured through the window that I opened my eyes. I dreamt that I was dreaming. A dream within a dream.
And, just like in the dream, I was shaking, afraid to get out of the covers and face the day.