Never piss of a chicken
Inspired by a very sharp pecking incident this morning because I’d forgotten the chicken feed; an oversight quickly remedied this afternoon.
Never piss of a chicken belongs to the following groups:
RiginalsNever piss off a chicken
She’ll catch you by surprise
Peck your calf with a sharp, sharp beak
And stare with her beady eyes.
Same goes for your little house cat
She’ll fool you with her velvety grin
Lick your face oh so lovingly
But you should know where her tongue has been.
Now, as for the school of goldfish
They say goldy has only 5 secs
To recall the unclean tank
and ever so sparse food flecks.
But you can bet your last, bottom dollar
If they ever grew long sharp teeth
Next time you’re scrubbing their walls
They’d get you from underneath.
And never piss off your dog.
Leave him sleeping where ever he lies
There could be a time when there’s no difference
Twixt your face and chow, in his eyes.
Next time you go out to do shopping
My advice is to take a long list
‘Cause there’s no telling how they’ll treat you
If their dinner has somehow been missed.
roybarry
HA-BRILLIANT!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Anne van Alkemade replied
thank you Mr B. I’m glad you’re feeling better too! Envy you the walk on the gusty beach. :o) Would have loved that.
rubyjo
haha, i have been pecked by the chickens b4- they can be a rowdy bunch. and a pissed off rooster! no thanks.
Anne van Alkemade replied
I’m so glad chickens don’t have teeth. hehehe.
Shoaib .
hehe, nice one i know not to make THAT mistake now
nice writing :)
- shoaib
Anne van Alkemade replied
we learn something new every day, don’t we Shoaib. :o)
Matsumoto
i”ve been staring at my cat
and the cat at me
i don’t know where her tongues been
but then nether does-
she lol
Anne van Alkemade replied
hehehehe, that’s a riot.
roybarry
Thanks so much Anne-this was the beach in question.
Matsumoto
I grew up with an interest in biology…first there was the dust…then the beach…then my sister…ugh! You remember the scene from “Pirates of the Caribbean” when he spits, wipes his hands on his shirt, and spins around. Yeah, like that!
Zolton
Ha ha. Great poem : )
Danny
never piss on a chicken either, they’re quick little bastards.
Anne van Alkemade replied
‘oh, is that a yummy worm’ she might think
Lawford
Now I’m worried. I saw my cat staring at the goldfish bowl the other day. I think they were plotting revenge. As for the chickens – that’s gumboot wearing territory at feed time.
georgiegirl
Love it… What a fantastic poem!! But you obviously haven’t met my Mum n Dad’s chooks!! (well, der… you are all the way over there). Their chooks (we’ve had lots over the years) are the friendliest feathered friends you could meet. They let you pat them, hand feed them and pick them up to give them cuddles :D I reckon the fish aren’t plotting revenge, but dreaming up ways to escape (Chicken Run style)... that’ll teach us for having the fishtank near the loungeroom/TV :D
Anne van Alkemade replied
My girls are quite friendly too, but insist that I give them more than cooked spaghetti or rice each day to supplement their daily forage. I forgot the seed!!!! And one of the black ‘baby chooks’ gave me a determined peck right on the calf muscle. Hurt by jingo!
georgiegirl
ps… the tank is now in the kitchen… away from the ideas box!
Anne van Alkemade replied
VERY good move. LOL.
ArcadiaTempest
LOL…..we have all that minus the dog… Our chickens think they are dogs and follow you around waiting for treats…so I guess we sorta have that one covered. Their bark needs a bit of work but ;>)
Anne van Alkemade replied
They’re not bad as early warning alarms too, if someone happens to be in the yard when they shouldn’t. Of my 8, there’s one in particular I have to watch. Sometimes I find her out in the front yard and she tried to follow us to school the other day.
georgiegirl
Better keep an eye on that little chick… such a cheeky little ratbag!
Cathryn Swanson
LOL!
Good work Anne :0)
wigs
very funny writing…and no I wont forget to write a list…. nice work
Anne van Alkemade replied
thanks Wigs. glad you got a grin.