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a day in the life of.... 16-06-07

A Sat-ur-day landed on the 16th day of June in TWOZEROZEROSEVEN

POLICE/murder-suicide/two young children/mother was found/crime scenes established*/no visible marks*/trying to contact/trying to contact….

CHILDREN as young/mothers serve time/sharing cells/Inmates give birth/razor wire/“He needs me as much as I need him.

DRINKING ‘surrogate’ alcohol/deaths among men in Russia/provincial areas/male mortality/small fraction/very rapid way to finish/ethano-lethanol-ethanol/Eau de colognes and medicinal *tinctures*…..

GRANTED actor/two teenage daughters/struggling to eat a hamburger/primary, physical and sole custody/beamed with delight/’*Enough is enough*….

The Birthdays – TODAY ONLY
great god with regret in your teeth

Tupac Shakur 1971

WHILE YOU WERE SLEEPING…..

0455 – Rome was sacked by the Vandal army, meaning Rome was tagged, all payphones had their handset ripped out and teenagers rode shopping trolleys into shop windows.

1925 – France accepted a German proposal for a security pact. Not even Germany could believe it.

1932 – The ban on Nazi storm troopers was lifted by the von Papen government in Germany. Again, not even Germany could believe it.

1952 – A Swedish rescue plane was shot down by Soviet fighters over Swedish territorial waters. The rescue plane was searching for a lost aircraft. Can you spell I-R-O-N-Y?

1955 – Argentine naval officers launched an attack on President Juan Peron’s headquarters. The revolt was suppressed by the army. Argentinian Naval Officers decided to rethink attacking land targets with warships.

1978 – The film adaptation of “Grease” premiered in New York City. Umm, enough said.

1980 – The movie “The Blues Brothers” opened in Chicago, IL See above.

1996 – Russian voters had their first independent presidential election. Boris Yeltsin was the winner after a run-off. ;run off’ being Russian slang for ‘who can be the drunkest whilst in charge of nuclear weapons and not destroy a country.;

1970 – Woodstock Ventures, the sponsors of the original Woodstock, announced that they lost more than $1.2 million on the festival

1976 – The TV show “The Jacksons” began airing for four weeks on CBS

1998 – The Spice Girl’s movie “Spice World” went on sale at video stores

1999 – Phil Collins received a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame

2004 – Scotland’s University of St. Andrews announced that it would make Bob Dylan an honorary doctor of music at its June 23 summer graduation ceremony

IDEAS for NEW SUPER HEROES

-A hero who has the ability to amplify damage to himself caused by projectile weapons. Power first discovered when hit with a water balloon at age 8 and lost a leg. Weakness: A spit ball could kill him.

-A hero who has the ability to knit any machine out of wool with full working parts eg helicopters cars ect.. Weakness: It takes several years to knit a helicopter out of wool.

-A hero who can spell any word given to him and use it in a sentence. Weakness: Pretty useless power when someone is trying to kill you.

HORISCOPE

ARIES 21st March – 19th April – You are the sort of person who believes that someone over the internet can read your fortune. Which is good because I just happen to be that person. Today you will be faced with many decisions, the hardest of which is whether or not you should forward me your credit card details. The answer is yes, you should.

TAURUS 20th April – 20th May – Today you are influenced greatly by the cosmos and the alignment of the planets. Basically, you’re a space cadet. Beam back down to earth some time soon and join the rest of us. Come on in, the waters great.

GEMINI 21st May – 21st June – This is definitely time to pay more attention to yourself. Its pretty clear you’ve been neglecting yourself. Why not go out on a romantic dinner with yourself and get the old conversation going. Have a few too many over dinner then go for a nice romantic walk along the beach. Who knows, this could be your lucky night WINK WINK.. with yourself.

CANCER 22nd June – 22nd July – You start things today that you really couldn’t be bothered finishing. This is ok, as you are extremely cool and look good in leather.

LEO 23rd June – 22nd Aug – *EDITORS NOTE – Astrologer is a CANCER.

*Joke of the day *

Two penguins are sitting on an ice berg. The first turns to the second and says ‘You know, you look like you’re wearing a tuxedo.’ The second turns to the first and replies, ‘Maybe I am…’ – Special Agent Dale Cooper.

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