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i Stopped Singing Praises Today

i stopped singing praises today
dropped ten thousand covers over
my soul to bury myself alive
Who am i kidding?
prayer is a distant sun
i cannot get to
briefly the warmth of its hope
reached me and i chased it away
gravity won’t release me from this earth
the insistence to leave is a quiet whisper
to find a peace i don’t have to battle over

i stopped singing praises to God
and i gave into the spinesless urges
to follow the cowards off bridges
and to throw the blueprints
of their lives away
as a failed script
i have walked away
to take the distant paths
“Don’t follow me.”

i stopped singing praises to God
i woke up grieving
and the colors disappeared
grey formless clouds surrounded
blinding me to God’s creation
air lost its taste
breathing a useless waste
and i mourned with the sinners
who caused their own misery
their shameless cries for pity
not merited

i stopped singing praises to God
i stood in the lines of desperation
waiting for Oprah’s empty
words,
still i swallowed sadness internal
madness taunted
a sea of destruction swelled up
to disregard the pain
take anything sharp
Let Christ suffer some more

and the choruses of angels stopped mid-flight
when i stopped singing praises to the Lord

copyright2010misfit1965

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“Who shall separate us from the Love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword?”
(Romans 8:35)

“There is therefore now no condemnation to those who are In-Christ Jesus, who do not walk according to the flesh, but according to the Spirit.”
(Romans 8:1)

When i stop praising God i feel miserable. TO GOD BE ALL THE GLORY!!!!!!

Tags

christ praise, jesus christ, oprah

I am a servant of The Lord Jesus Christ. He is my Saviour and Lord. I am also a Christian mother who loves The Lord Jesus Christ. My writings are for His Glory. i belong to Him, and it is for Him, that i live. I honor the life God has created.

Exalt The Lord our God,
And worship at His footstool-
He is Holy!
(Psalm 99:5)
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Comments

  • Chris1249
    Chris1249over 4 years ago

    Again this tussle of heaven and earth in the everyday way of things. Its a fine gift to demistify the spiritual yet keep the sense of it

  • So true, Chris 1249. Thank-you for reading and for taking the time for leaving a comment. God Bless You, my friend. matty

    – Matty B. Duran

  • EllEssDee
    EllEssDeeover 4 years ago

    Grey words to describe a grey mood.Well written but I can’t help hoping that you get some colour back and enjoy the vibrancy of life again real soon.Lee.

  • Thank-you Lee. I feel joy again, matty

    – Matty B. Duran

  • madvlad
    madvladover 4 years ago

    oh please dont say you have a mental illness you have a chemical inbalance that is all at fifty two stress from my job caused me to suffer a spell of i chemical inbalance called panic disorder i too thought i was going crazy but it was only the stress and it caused the brain to deplete some chemical that caused the awful panic attacks i was torrified i was going mad and wanted to kill my self but i learnede all i could about the mind and how it worked and have been better since then but yes i still have to be careful how i think and no worry too much or it coming back sooooo please dont say you are mental ill – there are pills that can help and settle you down so you can be at more peace and have hours of joy too and yes love god and his son too but know you are loved and much love your self as god does — we all have crossed to carry in love and life too so god bless you and make sure you have ti best dr possible to help with the right meds and yes prayers too love walt evans who off and on has to fight the dark side too hugs

  • Thanks for the enouragement madvlad. I hope you are feeling better these days as well. I guess we all have our good days and our bad days. I don’t cut myself so much anymore. I was offered medication, but I don’t take it. I just pray and praise when I begin to have feelings of despair. Thank-you for reading, and know that I appreciate your comments. I will keep you in my prayers madvlad. God Bless You my friend. matty

    – Matty B. Duran

  • emmy2
    emmy2about 4 years ago

    Powerful writing. I know this feeling all to well. I’m so glad God in His wonderful mercy doesn’t let us stay in this. God Bless you real good!!!

  • Thank-you Victoria. We as believers need to stay close to our Christ. I know when I am not close a little bit of me dies. It is so imperative to be filled with His Holy Spirit. We who are believers are blessed. Thank-you for your wonderful comments. GOD BE PRAISED!!! God Bless You. your sister-In-Christ matty

    – Matty B. Duran

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