A flame inside a frame

Unless you find yourself…you never find love…or where you truly fit…if we follow the norm…
we just become a cog in a wheel that moves slowly and is boring … so live your dreams….
find yourself … dance naked in the street!!!!! An excellent writing and a definite fav for me!!!!!

for me the CUT part was just the BEST…Cut on your skin…then MIND and finally your HEART….and so so much more here to TREASURE…...........I LOVED and LOVE your view and I’m so GLAD that you decided to write this PIECE…........from your heart and the REAL part of YOU…........very Touching, very Wise and very POWERFRUL!
and I do TRUST YOU! xx

This writing is fantastic and you are full of surprising wisdom and sheer talent.
Keep it this way, Shoaib… you have a wonderful style and a great heart.

WOW man, you sure have a lot to say,

The problem isn’t because it’s impossible to stick to what you believe it’s because inside time has made you meek
How can you say you love someone and stay with them because of convenience when inside you desperately seek
Someone to love you for your soul or for the words when you were honest about how your heart felt weak?

you covered so many areas in this, and at the same time kept it together, what you on Shadoobie, I love the above lines, you are so very talented, love to you xxxxxxxx

you are indeed a remarkable unique person and I need to come back and give this a proper comment, but you’ve made me think about so many things!

What you have written here is truly wonderful…and very, very true. Great writing…and extremely well said. You are gifted.

Wow ….totally transfixed and absolutely love the what you have written…there’s so much said and so much to take in, a briliant honest piece of work. you truely are talented… this I will keep to look at again. xxx

Wow!!!!!!!!! You Are Totally Amazing Hun:)))))))))xoxoxox

You know my thougths on this…TOO real TOO raw and TOO emotional for me to really comment here…. as I said before….this goes BEYOND poetry.

I will say this…you shouldn’t have to morph and conform to fit into love’s mould…TRUE love should just fit…

AMEN….Wow this poem is so insanely awesome…seriously. You have poured all yourself in this poem, And there were so many parts I liked, I wish I could quote them all and comment on them, but I would take up so much space. This is Brilliant Shoaib. WOW. I’m blown away. I couldn’t agree more with what you wrote here. such, truth, such honesty, and wisdom embedded in your words. This is one of those poems that shines uniquely. Love it. Instant favorite. :)

Wow…..Shoaib in a nutshell and what a delicious nut you are :) You know already how extremely talented I think you are as a writer and how amazing I think you are as a person. Parts of this made me cry, some made me smile. This is very open, and raw, and real and I applaud you for sharing this with us. I know I say this to you a lot but you really do always make me question things after I read your work. You are a pretty special person and I feel lucky to know you. Thanks for this Shoaib :)

Wow…I cannot express how much I felt this..and I think something I needed to read at this moment in time….beautiful, honest and straight from the heart…thank you for sharing this:)

excellent!

i’m going to read this again tomorrow when I’m not high and see if it touches me the same way. If it does, you’ve done something amazing.

It does.

Naturally, there’s plenty of things in this work I don’t like- the odd cliche, the occasional forced rhyme (if you’ve seen my work you might notice I don’t have much respect for rhyme and structure. I’ll use it, but if I can’t find shit to fit I’ll drop in a hit of the unexpected and let the enjambment do the talking “-P)

but for the most part, it flows beautifully, the uneven verse structures contribute to the sense of urgency (lovely how you’ve done that), the three-line stanza construction is fresh and keeps everything moving at a clip- pours you into the next line without a chance to take a breath and I find that stimulating.

And I haven’t even gotten started on what it says…

what a wonderful sentiment. I appreciate your honesty (not to mention your veneration of its virtues), the stream of consciousness, the forward-thinking attitude to heartbreak and lessons learned.

One part of this poem that drew my attention was these lines:

“When you were right compared to your father why did you think you were right?” and on this he dwells…

He said “I don’t know” and I shouted back “I KNOW, because you thought you had a broader perspective!
And maybe one day my child will think he’s right because we are all limited if we can’t look outside of ourselves and stop being subjective”

hardout dude.
I’ve been thinking a lot about that lately in the context of my own life, and I wrote down my thoughts.
check it out if you like, it’s on my profile and it’s called “all’s well, I said”.

anyway I’m a nerd with a harsh critical streak so I could sit here and rant all day, but the long and short of it is that this is fantastic, I felt at times you’d seen right into my heart and put into words ideas I’m too shy to confront, let alone express, and I’ll come back and read it again and again before I’m done finding new things in it to enjoy.

Peace.

This is really an excellent piece of work, your style is uniquely your own. Such a continual stream of thoughtful writing. everyone that reads this can and will relate to some part of it. I personally love the line; “And as the days go by and wrinkles consume your face, look at the picture of you younger and notice your pocket has made it to do the same” how profound! What I see and feel with this more than anything is the pain you are feeling from a lost love, reminds me so much of one of my sons right now. I’ve been around a while and if I could sum it all up, I’d have to say that broken hearts and being lonely are the worst states we find ourselves in, but like I said to my son, “Life is always a cycle, wonderful times will come around for you”. Thank you for this journey to your soul, it’s not often people are honest enough to open their gate, and it does make me want to dig deeper and write more meaningful pieces. Lately I’ve been writing a lot of humorous fiction, totally gotten away from poems, but I see more than ever that they are necessary to cleanse the soul. I really enjoyed this Shoaib. :) SZ

You caught a lot of great ideas in this peice.
Very cool!

Great Writings Very Talented
Anna

this is it …. you’ve touched it …
.... I too have to come back to read it again …..
...I will ….

”...The greatest lesson I can give you today is to take a picture of yourself and throw away the frame Carry it with you and look at it every day…”
Beautiful.
Life and energy, love, healing, all oooze across the page. Honesty. Loads of that, too.
Remarkable in its Hope.
xo

Congratulations ! from First things

This is so profound and so deeeep. It is looking into your soul and at the soul of all humanity. You practically covered everything that goes on with human life. I especially loved when you say that you may know more than your father, but then your child will think the same way, that he knows more than you. Then you go back as you are older, and realize your father might have been right, and you might think a little more like him, but you still know a little more than he does. Well, you said that this was long and to bare with it, and it was worth it. I’m not saying this as you said, to give you a good comment, no I mean it. I’m 54 and I think you have more insight than me. Now, I know even though you look like a kid in your picture, I’ve come to the understanding that you are an adult. But, may I ask? How old are you really? 100 years old? Because I saw a wisdom of a lifetime here. Loved it. And love the way you were able to make this monster of a poem rhyme and flow so easily. Congratulations.

I read this again and still love it….. made me smile and is very uplifting…. thank you for sharing xx

I think of people’s struggles and see life from a much broader perspective than my father
I asked him why religion makes exceptions like killing is wrong except if you’re a martyr
Because there is something about justifying killing in circumstances that left me bothered

This really impacted on me. It is worrying though you know, killing these days are shrugged off like human life doesn’t matter

-That’s why cuts on your skin heal, but are reminders of that day
Cuts in your mind change so you can look at them a different way
And cuts in your heart make you stronger by putting you through that pain…
i love that part. your writing has impacted me a lot, impacted what i think of myself.

the strength it must have taken to write this must have been outrageous.

thank you for this

This one is your best…........no double meanings for me to work out..lol, simple, straight from the heart, loved it and felt it.

A shoot straight to the soul read. Nothing held back. Emotionally full on.
Great writing as always.

As on old hippie, I could not resist the tag ‘do not click on this link under any circumstances’... I have spent my life clicking on forbidden links and feel I am richer for it. Your statement is a powerful manifesto of your truth and holds truth for those who would look and see. It takes courage to write, for written words endure and echo timelessly. Words are powerful and the impressions made by words go deep into the mind and spirit. I applaud your courage and I applaud your insight-deep for one of your seemingly young age, but age IS just a number and the spirit may be far more mature than the corporeal being. Thank you for helping restore my dwindling faith the the youth of the world, too many of whom are too self-obsessed and care little for the bigger picture. My step-son (Atheum, here on the bubble) is also such a young man. I am proud of BOTH of you. I wish you success as you continue your life journey, I wish you increasing spiritual growth, I wish you peace.

my god its a slap in the face with reality
“That cuts on your skin might last
And cuts in your mind might fade
But cuts on your heart never go away”
you have such insight i just cant believe it sometimes you almost seem to have the wisdom of many life times instead of just the one.

You said so much here….it’s fascinating to read all of your thoughts as they just seem to be flowing out of you….in one big connected stream…What I love the most is your intensity, your passion, and your conviction.

I so hear you bro. xxxx

OMg I dont think I have ever been at a loss for words…..this spoke to me like nothing EVER has. Its like you looked inside my soul and wrote it out word for word. I’m dumbfounded…..Sheer brilliance. I just cannot say enough. This should be read by everyone in the world. I know i will be reading it again and again. The metaphors…..friggin awesome!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I just read this again….OK I wish I could favorite this like twenty times. but then I would look like a freak. LOL Mindblowing….i am still trying to find the words…....seriously amazing. Hard hitting honesty that leaves a serious lump in my throat and makes me want to take a good long look in my mirror. Just wow…..

i had to click it u sed not too €:P and im so very glad i did as it is a epic piece its emotionally full on and locks u in xxx

Im glad I read this.
your writing has impacted me.. very much.

Listen, you are marked by your past, but you are defined by what you do
Always be patient, listen more than you talk and take advice given to you
Never lie to someone you love because breaking trust is hard to renew
And lying to yourself is even worse because then the faults all on you
Watch what you say because words always make or break more then you knew
Accept hurt as it is then move on because you still have so much to go through
It makes no sense always being blue, you have a destiny and its up to you to choose
Share with people something more than images… leave your soul to view

Love it all and related all too well. You are wise beyond your years and I know I have said that before = ). Not sure if that is good or bad but feel quite privileged to read you words and honored you share them with us all. Take care hon. Thank you xxxx

Just….WOW! and one more thing….thank you

well…. i feel like i know you now… and i very much like what i know…..... my comment made earlier tonight somewhere on here to you is already ringing true….... i’ve learned things from you already.. and THAT my friend.. is very cool…....... you put it all out there and defy anyone to say you shouldn’t… that alone gains my total respect…..... bravo….......b

I read this previous and didn’t leave a comment because I was pressed for time….but WOW….I think you’ve said it all…..well worth the 2nd read. Do you mind if I print it out? I think it deserves to be read from time to time when we stumble on those odd pieces of paper that we hoard somewhere safe, but never find until the exact moment that we need them again!
Excellent read, and great writing:)))

Nice to read something this raw and deeply personal. It has great impact. Thanks.

You have really put a lot into this work Shoaib; though something from the heart pours out more then one that is simply to write. The part where you talk about justifying killing in circumstances is something I’ve thought about myself a lot. I’ve also speculated about a lot of other things and reading this has made me think of that. When is it right, when is it wrong; better to remember or better to forget; to passively forgive or to punish so that the other one learns. What we think is the right way caused by the way we are influenced; as little children we believe that the older are wiser and know better, but they can be just as confused. This has been very inspiring Shoaib, Thank you.

I never knew this of you
I had a small inkling
of the inner view hues
Lay me in the words
dress me in the context
My frame is my evolution
Older in years I be than you
Tears I can attest still sting
Watching how they pattern
and redecorate my new frame….XXX

Your words blessed my heart…. thank you XOXOXOOX

This is awesome Shoaib, and yes, I’ve read every word. Really great and heartfelt, important writing!

Yes we carry scars fom losing our love one, it still remains in your heart forever

Lots to absorb, lots to think on. I’ve chosen to live in a way that does not conform to the patterns of this world, though people may not think so when they see my images – animals and fairies and crap like that ( ; but I know who I am and your work is very powerful and interesting and excellently done. Thanks, I really enjoyed this. M

Words from the heart…Beautiful and inspiring:)

I often wonder if love is real, you know the kind that forms endless attachments
Because I’ve latched on before so hard with no guard and just got passion’s scratches
For a second I don’t regret it, but it just leaves me wondering if people are really matches

Everyone deserves to be happy and follow their dreams and if you agree, stop trying to fit happiness in your life when you cry at night hoping to be
Because when you try to justify everything in your life you end up sleeping with someone when you really are cheating emotionally

The problem isn’t because it’s impossible to stick to what you believe it’s because inside time has made you meek
How can you say you love someone and stay with them because of convenience when inside you desperately seek
Someone to love you for your soul or for the words when you were honest about how your heart felt weak?

You owe it to yourself as artists to put your money where your mouth is not your wallet
And stop painting pictures as you think they should be and label it love or whatever you call it
Stop living and writing to fit into frames, think broader and write some Jackson Pollacks

i’m halfway finish and i’m like DAAAAAMMMMMMMNNNNNNNN!!!! you are killing it ….its a masterpiece of a piece

i’m liking the part about not falling to someone after they aren’t the right one ….just keep on moving….alot of people give up on love and just treat everyone after like materialistic waste
use them and off to the next ….man you killin it ….back to the piece lol….

damn its like you don’t lose it at all…you keep it hot and never cool it down i’m feeling this fa real
the best piece i have read in a minute you get the trophy for this lol

you are who you are and for that you should never be ashamed

Never stop trying to improve yourself, learn a new language, travel the world, be someone
I write of my past and try to inspire because even if I die tomorrow maybe my knots will help someone else become
The person they want to be because instead of wasting time wallowing in misery they’ll finally get up and run

You are so lucky and still might not want to thank God you weren’t born in poverty
I look at Darfur’s hunger and can’t imagine starving every day watching people kill my family
Stop being someone who cuts to bleed to feel real, your pain is enough proof for you to use your soul positively

I don’t want to write a short poem and give it out anymore for a comment because I love when people praise me
I want to drip my heart and mind in every fucking word so you have some substance and some sustenance from all the soul that drains from me
And never again will I let myself be afraid to speak because I know that in the end everyone judges you for the words you aim to speak

That cuts on your skin might last
And cuts in your mind might fade
But cuts on your heart never go away

LMFNO ….DUDE YOU WENT HARD…..I HAD TO STOP COPYING AND PASTING THEM TO THIS COMMENT …BECAUSE THE WHOLE THING IS JUST ONE BIG AZZ HAYMAKER….YOU KILLED IT
LOL

That’s why cuts on your skin heal, but are reminders of that day
Cuts in your mind change so you can look at them a different way
And cuts in your heart make you stronger by putting you through that pain

And when it came to love, trust me I looked at it from every angle way for my sake
I let my heart decide but it got torn that way so I let my soul decide, but it mourned after heart break
So I left it up to my mind to guide my decisions.. and have come to realize that even thats not any less susceptible to making mistakes

YOU SPOKE REAL SHIT HERE BIG BRO….LOL NO LIE …... I LIKES THIS …ONE OF YOUR BEST YET …..DAMMMMMNNNNN !!! I DID N’T THINK IT WASS POSSIBLE
CONGRATS ON THIS…..

You’re a real human Being
AWESOME STUFF Shoaib, quality, you are no slave to self but
true to self.
Much love oxo

I am reading this piece and feeling all types of emotions running through me as i read..the father thing really got to me and really made just reflect on all the bullcrap that one had to endure and still fighting through life..the mistakes and anger that fuels my being..that made me who I am today good or bad..this is the type of piece that makes me just sit back and take deep look at my life and the journey..take a good look at my life and the pain..take solace in the fact that although the lord and I may not see to eye that he has given chances after chances..that my death should have celebrated a while ago..this is just pretty damn good writing and contain a deep understanding of humanity..one love.

Astounding insights and understandings as always dear Shoaib..xo

This touches me as true, true, true!

so well done. I figured I ought to visit your page because you write such lovely poetry, it really fills the gaps in my daily 20 minutes of boring psycology lecture. I really don’t visit enough.

We are lined up side by side in a tiny box and the smallest of sparks can be so vicious
Or are we a fuse already lit and its only a matter of time before we realize this is all fictitious? Wow that is so powerful. It really makes you think, it’s the most unsettling part of any relationship romantic or otherwise. I’m not sure if that was the meaning that you intended to put forth but that is what I caught. Every relationship is so delicate, often like a tiny deer when first beginning. Everything is so fragile, you musn’t do anything too slow or too fast or you’ll ruin it. That’s the message I really recieve in this piece. It’s amazing. Thanks so much for posting it. Very very well done. I imagine it takes you quite long to think and write these doesn’t it? It’s lovely. Truly lovely. I look forward to visiting again on Monday.

wow. i read these lines: How can you say you love someone and stay with them because of convenience when inside you desperately seek
Someone to love you for your soul or for the words when you were honest about how your heart felt weak?
and wondered how the hell you could know that . . . you look too young to have been stung by that yet…
people have different inner attitudes to truth, the seeds of them were sown in childhood – how much of the truth can you bear to see? how much of what you see can you bear to speak? i suppose i have developed a kamikaze-like approach – i just want to look truth square in the face, even if it scares me, even if the truth is horrible . . . better to know. but i can well understand choosing a different path to this – art takes one of two paths (seeing or non-seeing) and they are equally valid from one point of view… what an amazing piece of writing shoaib. so much to ponder in this!

Wow! This blew me away! You are a fine soul Shoab! And a real poet! Kudos!

“That cuts on your skin might last
And cuts in your mind might fade
But cuts on your heart never go away”

So true!

Great writing, hard questions, harder answers. But I agree, be true to yourself, always. How could anyone love you if you’re not you?

this is a epic writting I swear its just a great write thank you so much for the comment on my
my reacent work it doesnt hold a candle to work such as this.
nothing i could say about this work would justify it great write

Very much Love to You Shoaib. Magnificence.
:- )

Such insight … passion for live … wisdom beyond your years … a leader you are Shoaib … you speak words that touch me deeply and comfort me at the same time …. to know that someone is out there that understands and relates ….. BEAUTIFUL …... (((HUG)))