Top Four Weight Loss Myths

In these times of misinformation and constant hype, I feel it my duty to dispel a few myths about a subject many can relate: losing weight. These lessons are self-taught and realized. It is my duty to share so that others may not feel the same let downs as I have experienced.

Myth#1 – Drink Diet Coke®
Frankly, I was shocked when this plan didn’t work. It seemed the perfect coup; eat, drink and be merry! I ate; I was merry; I drank diet colas to shed the calories. But, no shedding occurred. Not a single pound. Logically, assuming I was doing it wrong, I drank more. And more. Eventually I had to add rum just to make it tolerable. No matter how many Diet Colas I drank, I didn’t lose any weight.

Myth #2 – Buy More Vegetables
I’m going to cut right to the chase on this. No matter how much I buy, chop and store, having vegetables in my fridge has not made a dent in my expanding hip area. Even the calories burned from occasionally cleaning out the wilted lettuce greens and fuzzy peppers haven’t done anything good for my waistline. Shocking! And don’t bother spending extra on the organic – still useless.

Myth #3 – Buying a Treadmill
O.K. I could just feel the calories burning off as I used my credit card for this major purchase. And then the anxiety caused from the knowledge of multiplying interest was surely worth a few ticks off the scale. Again, I watched and waited. I moved my “skinny clothes” to the treadmill side rails as a sign of my sincerity to the cause and – nothing. Another sham!

Myth #4 – Joining a Gym
Clearly the ultimate sign to God, the universe, and my fat cells; I am serious. The endorphins from this sort of investment combined with the adrenaline rush from just thinking of how good “I am going to look” should have chased the pounds away. This being a long term commitment that could only lead to success, I’m waiting . . .

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Top Four Weight Loss Myths by 


Just for fun – inspired by real life. Everything is not as easy as it looks.

SO much going on – maybe a short anthology of real life silliness like this?

Comments

  • rubyjo
    rubyjoover 4 years ago

    hahaha oh yes, i can identify with this one

  • Thanks the note – hopefully at least the laughing will burn calories :)

    – Mardra

  • dolphinkist
    dolphinkistover 4 years ago

    OMG. Funny! And true.
    And somehow oddly more funny coming from you.

  • Just some of the things I’ve been learning the last few years.
    :)

    – Mardra

  • zoequixote
    zoequixoteover 4 years ago

    :D
    awesome
    adding rum to make it more tolerable, now there’s a plan :D

  • Ahhh, we do what we have to do. Thanks for the note!

    – Mardra

  • dolphinkist
    dolphinkistover 4 years ago

    Watching workout videos doesn’t work either, by the way. I’ve watched plenty over the years while sitting on my couch and I just got fatter!

  • That’s a great point. We’ll have to add that to the list.

    – Mardra

  • annieannie
    annieannieover 4 years ago

    roflol
    luv this one i just started at a gym x

  • Shouldn’t you be in bed? JK – Thanks for the notes, all very appreciated. :)

    – Mardra

  • Rikki Woods
    Rikki Woodsover 4 years ago

    How could we possibly not feature this?

  • Yea me – Thank you very much!

    – Mardra

  • Pooh
    Poohover 4 years ago

    Adding rum to the diet coke, actually works. The mixing ratio has to be exact, otherwise it won’t work … let me see … ehm. Three cans per bottle, nah that is wrong, three bottles per can, yeah that’s right. You need to follow the exact mixing ratio. When the bottles and can are empty. Stand in front of a full length mirror, sans clothing. You will see that not only have you lost those pounds you have put on … you are also, younger, fitter and incredibly hotter

  • If you use the same mix and drink with spouse – you’re both incredibly hotter!

    – Mardra

  • looknsee
    looknseeabout 4 years ago

    Damn! That’s what I’ve been doing wrong all this time! LMAO!

  • wrong? Noo, not our fault. :) Thanks for commenting.

    – Mardra

  • MaralynSpeaking
    MaralynSpeakingabout 4 years ago

    Thanks for the great advice. That’s 4 U-turns I have to take. Dizzying.

  • Maybe going circles will help – I’ll try that next :)

    – Mardra

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