You have succeeded in life when all you really want is only what you really need.
Out blurts the bastard lovechild Affluenza, from the fetid thighs of this and that.
The Porsche Boxster, surely most symbolic of the lack of taste and the greed of those inflicted with the virus, ideal for dampening the loins of others equally afflicted.
And so the virus spreads…
What do the words within the word within the car say?
“This shirt does not make me a better person. Neither does the phone I use, the watch I wear or the car I drive. These additions to my core will not make me a better parent, provider or friend than I already would have been. I have value independent of my material possessions. I pursue real needs over perceived wants. This shirt will not make me a better person. If your interest in me lies in the number of rooms in my house my interest in your has already ceased. I do not wish to be contaminated by your desire to waste. You are preventing humanity from moving forward. The children you have not yet had are already doomed. This shirt does not make me a better person, but perhaps a wiser one.”
Dedicated to Anne and Darren. Without whom, nothing.
Available for sale asT-Shirts
Cathie Tranent
No flippant comments on this one.
I know people like this.
Again. Brilliant.
Kitsmumma
wow, amazing, I did a search for cockbag and look what I found.
Another strong message, I hope these are actually getting through to people, so often affluent = effluent. Great design, I read it the hardway.
Lucan Industri... replied
Oh, full marks for effort, both in reading it and searching for cockbag.
jemimalovesbigted
I especially love how affluenza appears when its on white! Bravo
Lucan Industri... replied
What are you doing here?
sjem ©
Classic Lucan.
Every time you do a hand drawn type tee a mountain of envy swells up inside me and I want to reach through the internets and starngle you.
The texturing is really neat touch, it implies speed – but not necessarily in a good way. Excellent choice of car too. Was an M3 Beemer the next on the list ? I fucking love M3’s but the only people that drive them are fuckwits.
Lucan Industri... replied
Yes, it was on the list. As was the first Audi TT.
It’s a horrible piece of trash, Porsche only get good when they have numbers not names. It’s an afterthought, and entry level for the the fucking fashionistas. Has the badge, people will sleep with me.
sjem ©
Arrrg. Double bastard. It works on white AND black.
Lucan Industri... replied
The genius irony of what just happened will be lost on everyone, but not you.
Danny
I had a sort of influenza recently and I will definitely take affluenza anytime.
Love the dedication…..I love you.
Modern Toss appears on OZ TV this week.
This is not cryptic, I am unwell.
Lucan Industri... replied
DON’T WATCH IT. It will ruin any enjoyment that you may have got from the book (I hope there was some), somehow they got the TV show BADLY wrong.
Frank Stillitano
This is awesome, no doubt.
However I find a sense of irony in it’s title:
Almost every day I feel I move closer to acquiring the happiness mentioned in the title; That is, wanting only what I and my family really need. However the irony is that the closer I and others like you move toward this happiness, the greater is the sense that society as a whole is moving further away from this sort of emancipation from the material. Do you have the same feeling, and does it hurt like hell?
Great work by the way.
Lucan Industri... replied
Agree. It’s a daily struggle Frank old chap, it really is, the thing is I don’t even need to progress to feel the recession of the others, they are in 5th gear, 6th perhaps, winging it towards, well, actually, I’m not sure anymore, aside from climate collapse, the end of civillisation blah blah. The greed is even less sustainable than anything. And everyone is killing each other as far as I can tell, it’s all an cyclic struggle, people buy papers and give money to people who write things that infect them with distorted values etc etc etc. There are a thousand examples. I enjoy the virus metaphor of Affluenza, it really gets across how this spreads and is possibly unstoppable, you send your children to a school filled with children who are infected? They’re fucked. It’d take superhuman guidance and parenting to protect them. And I fear we’re short on that too.
Where’s the whiskey?
Scott Robinson
I wish I had the words to describe how many levels I enjoy this on.
Let me just say I`m struggling with the many levels of wonder here.
Absolutely amazing
transmute
I once had a housemate who worked at Porsche Australia, and he got to borrow a Boxter before it came out. We took it for a spin on summer night. I had long hair and a beard and smoked a joint.
Lucan Industri... replied
What an intriguing story, I hope you ended the evening by driving it into a hairdressers. Oh, actually, you were probably wasted, so you probably failed to find reverse and abandoned it on St Kilda road so you could go get some Pringles.
najeroux
Have you been crying in Luxury’s Shadow again Lucan?
Stop all this brilliance nonsense. I can’t be in love with you and Danny. I’m not 17 anymore.
najeroux
najeroux
Oh, yeah, wickedly intelligent and thought provoking tee as always. Fuck, why do I bother to leave comments? They’re all the fucking same.
najeroux
ToxtethOGrady
nice to see you’re still cranking out the HQ stuff
bravo
seventeen
This is design communication at its best. You are a master Lucan.
lostboy13
so th e E.S.P. is working…it only took a month to reach you..
i can now go back to sending you other thoughts.
Lucan Industri... replied
This is another one of those comments that’s completely lost on me. I like to think I had a smattering of education over the years, but I can still make no sense of this.
Amanda Cole
again sheer brilliance!
MuscularTeeth
lucan, the car itself so – so, but the wording is PERFECT. fantastic work. i like you included the watch bit. i find some watches amazingly decadent.
Lucan Industri... replied
Oh, a critic, thank you for your words. Yes, watches, a strange vice methinks.
What about the car in particular was ‘so-so’? Wouldn’t want to make the same error twice.
lostboy13
well i was just thinking (about a month ago) that your typography tee design were very well recieved.
ok you stroppy shit?
Lucan Industri... replied
Oh ho, “stroppy shit?” that’s a winner. Mister pot meet mister kettle.
I love you Dave, and all the other Dave’s like you.
Ange
i like the title.
Kitsmumma
I don’t know what possessed me, to search for cockbag that is, tomorrow I might try mutwig.
lostboy13
the feeling is mutual you creepy L33T rock spider.
Lucan Industri... replied
What? You just said I was stroppy, I threw it back at you, and now you’re saying it’s mutual? Yes, clearly we gathered that.
Unless you meant our love of Dave’s?
sjem ©
You replied to my comment three times.
sjem ©
You replied to my comment three times.
Lucan Industri... replied
No I didn’t.
sjem ©
You replied to my comment three times.
Danny
that’s because of your 3 heads Tasmanian
sjem ©
Yes. I will concede that. I will chuckle about it all night.
lostboy13
yes…i love myself…when i don`t loathe myself.
fuck your wife is hot…mmmmhot little strumpy crumpet.
Lucan Industri... replied
She’s a bit old for you, but you can have ten minutes, not that you’ve ever seen her.
lostboy13
i was looking at her just before, your all over google like a disease…
she WAS hot..when you both weren`t coffin dust.
Lucan Industri...
She looks worse in real life. Especially now.
lostboy13
Lucan Industri... replied
That was 40 years ago.
MuscularTeeth
when i mean so-so – i knew it was a car immediatly but the porcshe connection didnt hit me immediatly.
:)
Lucan Industri... replied
Ah I see, well that’s tricky. You see the image is drawn from an exact schematic of the 2003 soft top Boxster, it’s actually to scale, the hole’s in the As in fact basically line up up with the front and rear lights. So I can’t do much more there, except perhaps show you some pictures of Porsches, I suggest next time you see an ‘03 Boxster, lie down next to it, you’ll go ‘AMAZING’.
lostboy13
some of my favourite moves don`t require looking at the face.
she looks alright…i`ve done worse.
lostboy13
yeah and your a fuckin` ghost…or…are you?
what do you look like now?
lostboy13
i found you!
those scorpion gene injections are working well any side effects ?
Lucan Industri... replied
How did that get on the internet?
Sjem you lying bastard.
MuscularTeeth
yeah well i wouldnt take any critsism from me to heart – ESPECIALLY about cars. im useless with the damn things. i AM amazed by the way you got all them words in it.
id like to know the process you chose to do it with – did you take an image, and cut the words into it? or did you take the image put it on paper and wrote in it? or did you write each word and place it inside it? so many ways to do what youve done, AFTER you have realised the idea at all. and thats the brilliance, im here analysing what youve done, whilst you just worked it out for yourself. i bow before a master.
Lucan Industri... replied
No please, I enjoy it.
So it goes like this:
I thought of it, roughly.
I wrote the words.
I had a drink.
I thought of the car ideology.
I found the perfect yuppy wagon.
I had another drink.
I printed it.
I used tracing paper and a pencil to get the outline.
I used a pencil and then a sharpie to work out the ‘affluenza’ text.
I finished the bottle.
I got some more tracing paper, and traced the finished word.
I wrote the aforementioned text all over it, regularly rubbing it out and starting again.
Once finished it went on the lightbox again and I wrote it over with fineliner.
Then I scanned it and added some background grain in PS, which I don’t usually do, but I was quite pissed at this point.
I think that’s about it.
MuscularTeeth
you ROCK. i love the way u moved it off the pc for a lot of the stuff. i do that and i respektah the effort it takes. come over for a beer one day. anyways, i love the method and geniusness of eet.
jemimalovesbigted
appreciating your shirt! Why? is that not allowed?
jemimalovesbigted
If you prefer…. this shirt is shit and you are a cockbag!
Lucan Industri... replied
I’m surprised that’s all, after your previous behaviour, that you would be anywhere around here.
At least the second comment sounds more honest, well, except about the shirt being shit, obviously that’s not true.
Kitsmumma
there’s that tag again!
Lucan Industri... replied
The Unstoppable Cockbag.
jemimalovesbigted
you are correct, the shirt is not shit! and I really do not make a habit of being dishonest. I appreciate your art and I enjoy being able to do so. I am sorry you think otherwise….. Is it in reference to my going away shirt for you? Sorry if you took great offence, you are a clever man, I didn’t think you would at all. its a shame you don’t really know me at all.
Lucan Industri... replied
It’s in reference to attitude, words, and everything in between, the tee didn’t offend me in the slightest. I fear some of it was slightly irrelevant and misguided, but not offensive. Despite sweeping social discontent on my part becoming specific attacks on your part.
And this “its a shame you don’t really know me at all.” Firstly, it isn’t, secondly you imply you know me, which you don’t.
jemimalovesbigted
_I fear some of it was slightly irrelevant and misguided, but not offensive. _ Probably, and for that I apologise. I tend to act sometimes on feeling before I think it through thoroughly…
in reference to attitude, words, and everything in between Not sure about that, but fair enough, we all are entitled to our opinions.
And this “its a shame you don’t really know me at all.” Firstly, it isn’t, secondly you imply you know me, which you don’t. I take the hint and will not bother your work with any more comments. And no I did not imply that, but you are also correct again, I do not know you. Perhaps that is my original mistake.
Lucan Industri... replied
Perhaps.
transmute
How did you know about the Pringles? Now I’m paranoid…
Lucan Industri... replied
Been there, eaten that, etc…
Kitsmumma
the unflappable.
Danny
after reading this thread I believe it’s time to go
Lucan Industri... replied
Mors Ultima Ratio.
Farewell sir, it’s been an absolute
Danny
not me you knob…you
maybe ..both
Lucan Industri... replied
I didn’t imply who.
Anyway, one and the same.
Are they still hassling you?
Danny
No one has hassled me
I don’t know where that started?
I’m just so…...........................bored
Lucan Industri... replied
I suppose that’s why you decided to leave. Except you haven’t left.
Danny
I don’t occupy my body anymore if that’s any consolation?
Lucan Industri... replied
I don’t really need to be consoled.
Derek Miranda
that’s a cool design and a good message.
lostboy13
how`s that black pudding?
Cathryn Swanson
That’s a great message and excellent design.
Belmont Street...
Awesome shirt.
I think I might buy one to go with my Porsche Boxster.
Lucan Industri... replied
I can write D&G on the back if it helps.
Belmont Street...
I realised a few hours after seeing this the irony that you are selling it to people. : )
Simon Greening
Well there goes my original profound comment I’m reading all the way through the many comments wondering how no one has realized you have used an anti consumerist statement and made a consumer product out of it. That’s more ironic than Alanis Morissette. Yet still it was worth using that terribly cheesy Alanis Morissette joke. :)
Lucan Industri... replied
We still need to clothe ourselves, it’s a basic human need. The difference is this isn’t a $150 Hugo Boss shirt with no meaning at all, or a $110 Ksubi shirt whose sole purpose is to make you appear to be ‘at the cutting edge of fashion’ when all it really does is make you a conformist sheep. And that you’ll stop wearing in 2 months because it’s old hat.
T-shirts are the new billboards. And this isn’t as simple as being an anti-consumerist statement, it’s about the psychological issues of ‘keeping up with the Jones’s’ and that our value as a species is put in what we own rather than what we are or believe.
It’s never worth mentioning Alanis Morrissette.
Grandia
great design and great message!
vandal
genius