eleventh hour

you did not expect to wake

as you did not mean to acquiesce

in the love

and end with wounds that split your atom

or

you did expect

that the wakening

would always be split

you think about boiled lollies

and forget a broiled heart

you conjure inked goddesses

and all you want is your own goddess

not you

but for you

the little time

slows and grows

and you know it cannot be so

but it is

yesterday

has been lost on a name

Aedos rejects her shame

and stays with eyes that nod yes

at least for a few hours

so you will grow tall

you recall shadows of behind

and scream

clichés verbatim

you swore you’d never use

and you wonder

is this an age old premonition

tears

and

goodbyes

the final curtain

then you surface

it sounds absurd

you count

one

two

three

me

and you see yourself in the morning

a grip has loosened

and the one

who cheated

was not him or her

it was you

on

you

so you march

on

alone

with not a crowded ice heart

but

with a thawed

reflection

that drips knowledge

goddess/god given

onto an

even field

of homing coming heather


self



Comments

  • Matt Penfold
    Matt Penfoldalmost 5 years ago

    So you turn out to be your own nemesis but you were happy with that anyway… I love this piece Lisa, a really wonderful piece of written expression, it just seems so together :-) x

  • this one made me cry while I wrote it….

    so I thank you so kindly Matt

    truly xoxox

    – Lisa Jewell

  • Hathor
    Hathoralmost 5 years ago

    I love photos of just eyes.
    one two three, me. that’s it. if we can learn first to love the dark and the light in ourselves, we birth the present, the gift, the neucleus of truth – the god bone. it’s not an easy path to be sure, and it’s damnb terrifying to stare into, but if you can g=find the meadow after the storm…well…that’s everything.
    beautiful, L.
    xo

  • so very true my dear Seer

    thank you so much xoxoxo

    – Lisa Jewell

  • Matt Penfold
    Matt Penfoldalmost 5 years ago

    Oh and the image is compelling but a little unsettling…

  • it was taken last night when I woke….
    so yes I know what you mean but it felt right for this xo

    – Lisa Jewell

  • Hathor
    Hathoralmost 5 years ago

    Shit. sorry about all the typos. lol

  • I did not even see them :) xox

    – Lisa Jewell

  • sandra22
    sandra22almost 5 years ago

    Lisa..this reads a little Libran to me, ‘we can see both sides’ which can be damn annoying :))

    The “eleventh hour” seems the perfect title to me
    sandra xx

  • I’m not sure about Libran but I trust you
    I can see both sides and I’m a Virgo ;) hehe

    yes the title seemed right to me, so thank you

    love you xoxo

    – Lisa Jewell

  • Rhana Griffin
    Rhana Griffinalmost 5 years ago

    This hits hard babe. I wish I could have loved you while you cried.

  • you did xoxox

    – Lisa Jewell

  • Del Millar
    Del Millaralmost 5 years ago

    This is great Lisa, I love it.. and the goddess for you want, is a sort of human rights …
    As for acceptance, well, ’tis is a peace near perfect – a sort of stunned silence..
    the coming home offering the illusion of past its ’ inevitable ’

    lots of love to you

  • how lovely Darling Del….it feels like a balm xoxoox

    – Lisa Jewell

  • Mark Ramstead
    Mark Ramsteadalmost 5 years ago

    Coming to terms I see. Takes time, until time runs out.

  • just living Mark
    in the only way I know how to.
    x

    – Lisa Jewell

  • portparadise
    portparadisealmost 5 years ago

    This made you cry when you wrote it, and it will make thousands cry when they read it. Absolutely spine tingling words Lisa – this is, exceptional.

  • Thank you so much darling xoxoxo

    – Lisa Jewell

  • Arcadia Tempest
    Arcadia Tempestalmost 5 years ago

    hmmm so at that last possible moment ….of no return there was no turning back from knowing that love had quietly slipped a knot around the heart …
    There is a level of chastisement me thinks here about the ways one can ease that knot away, hoping no-one notices the mark it has left… An abrupt awakening to see that there may be a scar perhaps that should not logically be there… and to wake to find the scar was self made..
    That little scar….tis little really is a bookmark that’s all…
    This on to an even field of homing coming heather felt to me it was such a new kind of beginning that it created a new origin from where the heart would now speak from…
    This is a really in depth piece for me ….. I have read it a few times and know that there is a need to forgive in here….forgive ones self that it …. xoxoxoxo

    Cheatin

  • I can only nod and thank you darling,
    tis a bit hard for me to get into this one…

    your thoughtful, insightful comments are always a pleasure.

    Love you xoxoxo

    – Lisa Jewell

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