Amazing Work with YOUR inner child
Please read this with an understanding that this is where I was I do not feel abused nor a victim in any way shape or form. I feel however you have to start where you are. I am where I am before you move on past the pain. I recommend for anyone looking for their inner child to do this work
The person who helped me so much a couple years ago asked that I do a flow of whatever came to mind of my first meeting with my inner child.
This inner child piece was written as is, I made very few changes to it. I did not edit this as I wrote it .. Raw and from my heart to my sweet little Lynne, whom I have grown to love more and more as each day passes on.
xox
HERE IS THE SECOND PIECE I WROTE After a few months of discovering her
Amazing Work with YOUR inner child belongs to the following groups:
Core [C.O.R.E], The Red Writing Room, Up & Coming Writers and Writing: Persuing HappinessLina: “Lynne, come here darling, come close to me”.
Lynne: Scowling, angry tears turning her back towards a corner. “Not fair, not fair” she ranted on and on crying so hard.
Lina: “Lynne” (softly speaking), “Lynne, this is Lina I am 50 years old now, and I love you darling, nothing more will happen to you. I will embrace all of your pain, all of your tears and I will dry them with my heart. Come here dear, stop crying now, stop running from my arms.”
Lynne: “I hate him sooo much! He is not nice, no one cares, I am alone alone alone, and it’s over! I hate him so very much!”
Lina: “Yes darling I am hearing you now. I am hearing you now so come to my arms, no more leaving everyone, no hiding darling. I am all grown up and want you inside me forever to go everywhere with me, just like Misha (her dog) used to do. I have so much room now just to hold you my darling, I do.”
Lynne: slowly sob after sob, stomping her feet and saying
“No No No!! Leave me alone, get out get out, I hate all of you! You never never cared! You never understood. You are Bad Bad I am Bad Bad Badder!! I’m the worst I hate me I hate me!!”
Lina: Crying now drops down to her knees and says:
Lynne I will never never let you go. I will take you in my arms forever. You are me and I am you. We can do this together, you and me; we can take all the time to melt into one. I don’t want to let you stay down there anymore. It is cold and lonely and the shadows are not your friends!! I am your friend, I am your mother now, and I am your father now. We are stronger together Lynne…
Lynne: Crying still in deep pain Oh such shuttering of her broken heart.
“Lina” she sniffed, “Why so long you gone?” “Why you never ever look to me? I scratched crawled, clawed and bit my teeth into you and each time you just turned your back on me, you never cared about me.”
Lina: Oh Lynne, please look at me now, please look at me now. I want you to see how much I’ve missed you and how much you mean to me now. I will not let you down my sweet pea. I will be here and take your hand and we will climb up the stair together. You are my heart and soul, I’ve been missing this for so very long. I want you to see me in these eyes NOW. I had to turn my back on your pain for so long because I did not know you were down here. How did you do it precious? How did you survive?
Lynne: I did it with all my anger. I did it because I was too angry to die. He used his finger and mouth and penis sometimes. I used to think of him like a good man, but his face used to turn to ugly ugly shadows. I saw how unfair my life was so I got angry trying to get your attention. Sometimes you only let me out when enough pain was created. So pain anger pain anger – I could come up for air then.”
Lina: “Can you come close to me now just, just for a test to see if you can be close to me without the anger? See that I see you now, perfect whole, and a reflection of all that is Divine? You are my heart and joy little one, you are my missing link, my peace, and my truth. You are what will make me strong and you are my core happiness. I will hold you, protect you, nurture you and keep you smiling. And I will help your pain to cease. You are me and I am you. I can invite you upside now.”
Lynne: sniffle, Sniffle She turns with eyes wide open, her face full of defeat and her shoulders are slumped. She slowly approaches Lina looking down to the floor.
I, Lina am seated cross-legged and she sits, plop on my legs. I take my hand and put her chin in it. I pull it ever so slightly till she is looking with amazement and comfort into my eyes for the very first time. Yet, It is not forgotten, our bond, it is not foreign nor uncomfortable. She says: “Lina will you promise to take me everywhere with you? Will you buy me pretty dresses and bears and chocolate and make a nice house for me to live in comfortable?”
Lina: “Yes Yes Lynne, I will, I am manifesting our dreams right now! We will dream together, you and I and we will never want for anything as you are my precious little girl. My God I’m 50 for Gods sake! I can take good care of you my darling. You never ever have to see that pit again.
Your father is long dead now and he is only a phantom: he has no power over US anymore. You and I release him NOW. He is not even a bad memory, he is just an old obstacle that crumbled so very long ago. You thought power was always in the LEAVING…now you can come to feel and see that we have the power of ACCEPTING. We can have our place of Acceptance NOW NOW my sweet pea.
Ok?”
Lynne: “Lina?”
Lina: “Yes”
Lynne: “You promise I don’t have to find you or scream or act out like I am going to die before you see me feel me and know me?”
Lina: “Oh darling Lynne, this is all yes yes yes. I will have you inside in a warm part of me. We will look ahead together. We will stop all the leaving together. I Love you Lynne, so very much my precious.
Lynne: “Lina”
Lina: “Yes”
Lynne: “ok”
Vasile Stan
Oh precious Lynne, oh wonderful Lina. I’m touched so deeply. You both are angels.
linaji replied
Well dear V.. we feel pretty darn good these days.. no more leaving and hiding.. facing the truth sometimes takes a while cause we do not know how free it is to feel absolute truth.. and for me that means.. say and do and look at people that way that FEELS GOOD.. making one’s own reality is sometimes the best truth there is.. Sending you angel hugs from the both of us.. ooooooo
Lynn Moore
Thanks so much Lina. This is beautiful and sounds so familiar. I’m glad you rescued her from the dark place she had to live all those years : ) This is wonderfully therapeutic exercise.
linaji replied
Lynn, I have mentioned it before as we have gotten to know one another, but this work you are doing is so important. I feel as some others have said there seem to be many children for some we must connect with again. for me there is only one I left behind and she was 6 the last we had seen one another. All after that became a forgotten mess and the life I lead that followed did not seem to really colese till we met up again and I was ready to embrace and revive her trust.
So it goes.. from that point on I was able to understand and attract more healing in these past years than a lifetime before.. All of Me.. all’s it takes is knowing we can have Us All!! tee hee.. thanks so much for allowing me to find this piece and get going on this part of the book!! your an angel!
linaji replied
I mean coalesce !!
Leon Walker
Bless you Lina!!!
linaji replied
Leon.. your a prince.. a bit heavy.. but this was one of the most amazing exercises I did on my way to my heART and my writing.. what a freedom to find All of WE! tee hee..xoxox
linaji
I mean coalesce !!!
Mary Ann Reilly
all i can think of is the drama of the gifted child. you are so brave.
linaji replied
Mary Ann.. what a blessing these past few years.. heck these last few days have been amazing… I don’t know if it is like the peeling of the onion or the waking up and feeling that each and every part of your life is worth it if it brings you smack dab right here to this moment!! smile and hugs.. I really always appreciate your candor and your smart sense of life.. xox
DanaMS
Oh darling.. thank you so much for this writing.. during this reading long lost ME came to me.. shy and quiet, pretending being brave for such a long time, left alone years ago when I turned my beck on her. And we both get on our knees, embrace each other and cried.. longing and missing each other through all that time.. living life for others.. Thank you.. now I must go.. and live. You just gave new meaning to my life. I’m going to stand up for US. Together we are strong enough to do it. I’m grateful you crossed the path of my life Linaji. Bless you my dear friend. xoxoxox
linaji replied
You are so loved Dana.. and a talent to recon with.. you have all of you in you to feel good and live happy.. I am blessed with you Dana.. sending lots of hugs for you both..xoxoxoxo
artist4peace
Bravo ..what an xxxcellent rebirth.Beautiful…...perfect.
Been there… now here! ; ) xXx
linaji replied
Hi Artist.. your being here and saying so means the world to me.. much much thanks..xoxo
billyboy
For me, this is the best thing I have read from you… and not just cause for once I totally GET it… but because it has the emotional impact to make me cry and the rapport you build between mother and child is so real and three dimensional… I felt myself totally caught in the whirlpool generated by the surge of both their hearts, and entwined in the emotion of their history.
I think this piece should somehow be marketed and translated into 102 languages so it is available to every mother and child on the planet… and when we finally colonize the moon, I`ll expect to see this in the very first lunar library. OK, mars is further down the line… we mustn`t get ahead of ourselves, yeah?
Thank you for giving my day such an emotional start with such a soul-searching, and uniquely presented story. I`m gonna frame this and hang it in my favs!!
xox
linaji replied
Hey you Sweet Billy,
I am so touched by your comment and was totally tempted to keep both but to tell you the truth just one has the power of Love and Kindness that we both treasure so much ..the second one seemed a bit greedy, and well, greed gets one nowhere except wanting sometimes stuff that don’t deliver. You do. In ways beyound my own expectations as a human..Being.. on this planet. It is 4:25am..I feel even better physically today. I am going for a walk first thing. And like Lynne, I plan to carry you with me on that walk in a warm place, amongst the healthy parts of all that is me. Lynne has told me, can he stay cause he is the best thing since BREAD.. and that means my fav bread and that means, sourdough or some of that Belgium stuff you talk about that I would so go ga ga over. With fresh cream butter too. So it is ok to have some since I am walking it off with you too.. tee hee..
Thank you so much B.. you have changed the scope of so much in my life into pure positive fun and joy..’We’ just adore you.
xox
billyboy
Opps…
Tried to fav it twice but it didn`t work (tee hee!)
x
linaji replied
I am going back to bed and will be up by 6:00am.. or 6:30.. got that first random missive too.. wow! going back to sleep pretty psyched!!
billyboy
So… you can either remove one of those, or keep `em both up so everyone`s gonna see how enthousiastically i`m barking and licking.. and stuff…
linaji replied
I would not mind seeing at least 3 of these icons on each of my works every time!!! no matter how silly … it’s cool! ..as she does her big smile thingy…:-D
RuthFroehlinger
Lina, your beautiful Lynne, your sweet pea, has found your embrace. Her eyes light up now, she knows she is safe and loved and forever behold this special bond between child and mother, father. Lina, you have found your beautiful Lynne, and comforted her, your love is unconditional and eternal. You are now gentle and understanding, cause you’re a mature woman full of love and light. What a wondrous relationship you both have. Together.
linaji replied
Ruth!... you have givin us both such a lovely comment and the feeling from you is so profound and kind.. I am going back to bed just to dream you were here to hug! ..and I am not kidding about that either. Thank you Ruth, it seems we are soaring and smiling and well, I got me some chills.. xoxoxoxo
Songwriter
Dear Lina/Lynne, Thank you for sharing such a deep and moving experience. And doing it so well. My own journey has mirrored yours in many ways and I too have taken my child into myself to comfort her. You are a blessing to all who have survived such experiences and to those who haven’t and want to understand. Thank you so much brave heART. :0) Song
linaji replied
Dearest Songwriter.. I have put you on my watchlist as what you bring here vibrationally is total love and caring. It is a blessing to have found out that once I took Lynne into my arms that the feeling of freedom and caring really did increase in my own life.. epic proportions too! Much Love coming your way .. and I feel yours too. We are Blessed!
F.A. Moore
A good writer can move you. A good piece can move you to tears…which this one did. I guess it hit home. Lynne, welcome to the bunch of crazy, loving artist, who know and love your Lina, and through her are getting to know and love you.
linaji replied
F.A…...Oh my dear friend! Your work this morning and now this I see.. I am so pleased too.. that Lynne is being exposed to all the world that makes her mom completely happy!!
You are so very cool F.A.!
kjgordon
Lina is the best….............
linaji replied
Hugs you sweet man.xox
Lynn Moore
Lina, I’m so glad you found it…look at the result! Many are so touched and resonate with your words. Keep going on that book!!! : ) And thank you for your kind words to me above.
oneperfectkiss
ah Lina thank you so much for sharing this. xxx
linaji replied
I so enjoyed your work on growing up.. kinda when I read that was reminded of this piece.. Lynn above you wanted to know what kind of work I did with the inner child part of my life.. this exercise was so powerful.. Love you again.. and a kiss too!
Cherubtree
Perfect timing for this writing right now Lina…with the Chiron placing and all of us facing our own healing work! Wonderful work, my Dear friend!
linaji replied
Yes Yes!! The part of you that is so wonderful for me is your steady flow of goodness and light.. I thank you so much for commenting on this piece. xox
Keith Reesor
Self acceptance and love are wonderful things!! :)
linaji replied
you are so wonderful.. you know all this stuff cause you have a clear mind and an open heart,, I so appreciate you Keith!
autumnwind
oh boy, now I’m crying like an idiot and need to get ready for a family get together. just what I am not up for. I am feeling your love and your hug, so grateful for your caring, and sharing. I definitely need to work on finding her. guess we all have different reasons. love to you. stay beautiful, and thanks so much, shar xoxoxo
linaji replied
you are gonna have a wonderful time Shar.. let go of caring a fig for what ‘they’ think.. hold onto you and hug YOU!! I am with you in spirit today as I feel you dearly and lovingly right here by the water.. where I shall read to you sonnets of joy!! xxxxOOOOO
Erika .
oh my, Lina…I have tears in my eyes. You have no idea how this conversation resonates so much with me..
Lina” she sniffed, “Why so long you gone?” “Why you never ever look to me? I scratched crawled, clawed and bit my teeth into you and each time you just turned your back on me, you never cared about me.” ....oh this part is exactly what my inner child said to me as well when I embraced her. I am really at a loss for words right now, just know that I truly felt this piece to my core for I’ve had the same conversation with myself in the past.
I have two pieces that are similar to this that I’d like to share. They were difficult to write but so worth it. They’re kind of long, so I hope you don’t mind the length. They’re also written in dialogue form:
Young Girl
Hot Chocolate
Thank you for sharing this my dear friend…it truly touched me. xxx
linaji replied
My dearest Erika,
I am touched deeply by your comment. It is still fresh in my heart when I feel another who ‘knows’ and has done this deep and real work. I am going to find your pieces and read this evening. I am out the door now and did want so to connect with you and thank you so. xxxOOO
wigs
incredible writing Lina…..... It drew me back to my 40 birthday, my friend bought me a book of quotes, all sorts, which I read from start to finish being as I was on a coach for 7 hours and there was one that bought me to tears….. think back to a time when you young and sad and tell that child that everything will be ok .... I cried for nearly an hour as i pictured myself and knowing that I would never have believed….. this really is an incredible piece of writing, it bought me to tears…. acceptance is such an important step and by doing so you have found peace…. thank you for sharing
linaji replied
I have such chills dear one, I too seem to cry each and every time I read this as it is fresh that moment when I truly did meet my sweet Lynne. I feel blessed you stopped in and shared with me too. I want to thank you for this feeling of acceptance I seem to have desired in the last few days and here it is, my girl just kickin up a storm cause I been kinda gone.. Sending you big Hugs. OOOOO you are so welcome
wigs
Lina, this incredible writing is featured in;
Writing: Persusing Happiness….
linaji replied
OmG.. I am so pleased and hope this finds it’s way to the hearts that desire to know more.. you are a total love.. I am honored!
Cheryl Fugate
OMG ….. TEARS …. I cant even put into word how awesome this write is … I just love this one … One of the best I have ever read that is for sure ..WOW WOW WOW!!!!!! Congrats on your feature … I too am expressing my abusive past through my poetry …BUT yours girl ….WOW still so amazed, INstant favirote!!!
BikerAngie
WOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MY MOUTH IS WIDE OPEN AND NOTHING COMES OUT! AMAZING THE WAY YOU HAVE CAPTURED THE EMOTIONAL TRAUMA SURVIVORS OF ABUSE GO THROUGH!!
C J Lewis
Wonderful you have written this Linaji … not only to help yourself but also to help others of such abuse. May you walk with a smile on your gorgeous face, the wind under your feet and your spirit soaring … you & Lynne deserve it. Fabulous writing :)xoxoxo (for u both)