I have walked through my mind today.
I found out that it is innocent of
All malice
Really… all it wants to do is think.
I will start it off with something like
Shit… that hurt…
Then my mind starts to do its job.
Opening the files
Now A thousand miles long
The drawers are full of past key words
That start with:
Shit…that hurt.
Skipping over the obvious.
My mind works like a professional
A Consummate professional,
Looking for the minute details
Of pain,
The kind you find in your pillow
Soft at first
Inviting you to dream
About him again,
About Her
About Them,
Ohhh Shit..That hurt.
The files are opening up a mile a minuet now
See; See, it never changes
He, She, Them,
Disappointing in the End.
See, I remember
Then
I remember
When
But wait say I,
Wait just a dog gone minute.
This is NOW
I SAY
But my mind is in a hurry
A flurry
For the Race is on….
Let me see
February
1983
Look at this day
It was the last week somewhere in May!
Oh Shit… that hurt!
THEN
But you are not
THEN.
Hey where did that thought creep in?
I breathe and know,
The files have got to go.
Mind I say.
No-No.
Not today.
And it is like the end of the ride
On the Big Dipper
Boardwalk Santa Cruz
The hands were in the air
Screaming as you drop
The thrill of the hop
Then you settle down
The ride comes to the end.
The bar that has closed you in
Releases
Your get out
You smile sometimes and say
Cool,
Again?
And this time I say,
No,
A corn dog and some fries
Sound better.
A CORN DOG AND SOME FRIES
ENJOYING THE RIDE!
helene ruiz, 3 months ago
lol…love this and the image is perfect…i will join u in the dog n fries
linaji in reply to helene ruiz’s comment, 3 months ago
welcome home my dear helene.. missed the hell outta you!
Judi Taylor, 3 months ago
Sometimes we think too much about things .. about past hurts .. about furture hurts even that have not even come but fear they will. Yes, sometimes we just need to get off that crazy wild ride and go have some corn dogs and fries … with a friend or sometimes even better .. ALONE! Thanks Lina. Hey when are you available on Sunday .. Saturday is not good for me.
helene ruiz, 3 months ago
how r u? thx for the corn dog :)
linaji in reply to Judi Taylor’s comment, 3 months ago
Perrrrrrrfffffffeeeeeecccccccttttttt.. and so it is.. thank you for the comment and you!
linaji in reply to helene ruiz’s comment, 3 months ago
lol do you like mustard? or ketchup or both?
Patricia Anne ..., 3 months ago
I like this writing Linda1 I Love that crazy photo! That is really good!
Patricia Anne ..., 3 months ago
I like this writing Linda1 I Love that crazy photo! That is really good!
helene ruiz, 3 months ago
both lol
linaji in reply to Patricia Anne McCarty’s comment, 3 months ago
OUuuhhh.. Patricia.. you are a love for sure.. I have had this photo forever and finally put it in Black and White.. very happy home indeed.. I will post with the poem later…as photo..appreciate your view and comment.
kjgordon, 3 months ago
corn dog and fries sounds good to me especially after the ride….
I think therefore I hurt…..HHmmmm!
linaji in reply to kjgordon’s comment, 3 months ago
yes especially after the ride.. wanna come? and you are so very deserving of my character..hmmm smart is he.. thank you KJ.
kjgordon, 3 months ago
My older Kaikua`ana
linaji in reply to kjgordon’s comment, 3 months ago
I know.. he in inside you and you in him…xox
N Kumar Bellani, 3 months ago
Love this photo of entrance to S.K.Sorcar’s Magic Show…the poem of course went over my head lol
linaji in reply to N Kumar Bellani’s comment, 3 months ago
No it did not. I know you can do it.. what does a mind do when You start to think a thought? it takes you sometimes… to places that you don’t need to go…. so get off and eat a corn dog..or in India.. I like Samosa and Pakora when I am walking or out for the day!! lolol
N Kumar Bellani, 3 months ago
lololol!!!! you’re right darlin’...I’ll try again…I just love Samosa and Pakora…just as much as I love you…lolololol!!!!!
linaji in reply to N Kumar Bellani’s comment, 3 months ago
NOW YOUR TALKIN!! xox
N Kumar Bellani, 3 months ago
xox
lianne, 3 months ago
Lina – this is quite possibly one of the best things you’ve every written! Brilliant insight into our own tendencies to relive the negatives, the hurts, to file them away and take them out often to look at and “reread” as if doing so would change the script! Those last lines??? Let’s make them our motto, huh, dear friend? A simply brilliant work, my friend!
linaji in reply to lianne’s comment, 3 months ago
Just off to work,, and what a lovely comment dear Lianne.. I agree.. we shall look to the other when ‘those’ times crop up and say.. “Ya wanna go for some corn dogs and fries?!” lol much much thanks!
aspectsoftmk, 3 months ago
shit that hurt…......hot damn dear lina…..this is some good writing….i olove it…i will read this to my glass tonight and let them have some feedback…...they will say hell yeah…double mustard on mine…lol….and i will have the veggie version with mustard….and some hot sauce…lolol btw i love the black and white….xoxo
TeriLee, 3 months ago
I am so sorry I did not comment on this sooner…I read it shortly after you posted it and I had to read it to Craig….he was belly laughing at the end and completely connected…as for me…well, my thoughts are as simple as ..WOW!!!....lol….this was such a fantastic journey, truly a fave!!! xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo
linaji in reply to TeriLee’s comment, 3 months ago
www I’m such a big baby!!! Thanks so much for the share with hubby the fav and Specially Uuuuuu.
Mechellerene, 3 months ago
SIGH….did you hear it coming through the atmosphere? You have a beautiful way with words that hit the core of the matter so succinctly…I remember for monthes I prayed before I went to sleep…God, just kill me in my sleep (less trauma for the kids-ugh)...I’d wake up the next day, and the first words out of my mouth (no exaggeration) were…”Shit”, as in…I’m still here. Well, I’m WAY beyond those days, but your writing strikes a chord that I believe is common to man, and sooo beautifully raw and honest. And the image…it fits!! And brings a smile to my face today. You and blamo have me in such a great mood!! ((HUGS))
devotee1, 3 months ago
Just great, Lina—I can’t begin to tell you how much I see and admire in your art. Poetry doesn’t get any better than the marvelous work you publish here at RedBubble. Another favorite! I know it hasn’t come without great personal commitment of body and soul—but, as you know, we only get out what we are willing to invest. Marvelous job!
linaji in reply to Mechellerene’s comment, 3 months ago
I am so late on this reply as I did not want to rush it.. I had to work day and night yesterday and saw your wonderful reply as I was commuting. I am so very happy for you and your Joy.. As you bring much to me as well as so many others here.. Yes this is common as we talked about the other day.. I was in alot of pain but it was all for the part of me that doubts where my heart is.. So just take a load off and have a ball.. look the other way when others are not what you want them to be.. they are what they..need to be.. ALLOW ALLOW ALLOW… and for me I must allow me to be just ..Oh..Shit.. too.. but like you it is in the past that I stay anywhere near in any negitive feel.. ..Again ..thank you so very much..xox
linaji in reply to devotee1’s comment, 3 months ago
Joe,, thank you so much. Missed you last few.. I have been gone too as work is consuming me.. I must attend to home today too… so this is my last comment for a while so I can catch up!
So much appreciation and Love to you and yours… the words are my send off.. I feel appreciated too.. thank you!
pinkyjain, 3 months ago
Ahhhhh, so fabulous, memories do hurt, but they are sweet still to have & to hold & to share, too, beautiful words Lina
LindaR, 3 months ago
excellent and visual descriptive writing my friend ~ defining the “ledger keeper “and it’s endless volumes ~ the pull of wanting to flip the page and point ~ and YOU in the NOW can decline ~ simply saying “thanks for sharing” ~ I’m off to grab a bite of something good and NOW ~ bravo Lina ~ your verse is such a gift xxx
linaji in reply to pinkyjain’s comment, 3 months ago
Pinkyjain,, I would never say no to sweet memories.. it is the ones that effect the decisions to still love to still believe that I can be me no matter what I have been dealt with in the past.. You know.. I will never love a so and so because I was hurt…or they are so mean.. I will never put another piece of my work up… because in the past….like that.. so it is all NOW for me..in my heart.. what my heart loves is what I want to follow..xox you are in my VERY GOOD MEMORY FILE!! LOLOL
linaji in reply to LindaR’s comment, 3 months ago
YOU ROCK.. and more.. your kindness and consistancy has been so wonderful… I am in some pain these days..don’t wanna go into it.. but appreciate you here today… I have not had the chance to go into others work.. am going to yours today.. I knew you downloaded some beauties but I got home sooo late… Love you and thank you for your support in so many ways besides RedBubble.xox
bearpaw, 2 months ago
Lina you are a brilliant person and you have great insight and strength… may your journey be full of peace, love and wonder… & corn dog & some fries :) xxx
linaji in reply to bearpaw’s comment, 2 months ago
lately that is all I am begging myself to think of! a tough spot for sure.\thanks for all your well wishes Paw…xox
amarica, 2 months ago
wow Linaji, you do dig deep when you take a trip inside. Been there, done that, felt the pain, felt the love, felt the sorrow, felt the passing of time, the stillness of the darkness, the brilliance of the light, the joy of discovery, the sadness of regret. It is good to write it and share it with others who understand and care. xxxxxooooo
RMonroe, 2 months ago
Shit…this is brilliant. I love the way you release the pain into joy and laughter:)
linaji in reply to amarica’s comment, 2 months ago
Amarica.. I missed this beautiful reply.. thank you.. so full of your very special thoughts and care.xox
linaji in reply to linaji’s comment, 2 months ago
Robin.. I love the word ‘shit’! thanks for the back acha!!
MtnMan, about 1 month ago
You seem to have mastered living in the NOW
when we talk, cut to the chase and tell me HOW
linaji in reply to MtnMan’s comment, about 1 month ago
You are bringing me back to a piece I like very much.. I sould actually read my own stuff!!~ I need to remember these wise words.. M.. you know.. we are a giant forgetful bunch of good well meaning people who have a hard time getting to the gym..let alone watching our thoughts.. that my friend is the secret.. The thinking and the focus of our thinking.. that is what creates the next thought.. I am reminding myself. OK.. Now here I am.. how do I want to feel now..
I have to choose a thought that feels better.. and that is a practice of a lifetime.. but the results are magnificent!
MtnMan, about 1 month ago
The results are indeed magnificent. I can see it in your face, and feel it in your words. I have at times tried so hard to make things beautiful for everyone, that I forget to feel beautiful myself. It does happen by chance occasionally.
linaji, about 1 month ago
ahhhh! There lies the difficulty …when we are so busy figuring out what the other person needs to be happy,satisfied..or otherwise..we are always open for dissapointment .but when we tend to our own lives in a way that feels good .. People around us are transformed.. And they too start to seek out their own feelings for happiness. It is our habit M.. And the hurt and bumps along the way are many at first ehen you begin to listen to how you feel rather than how you think you should feel or espically how you think others should feel or act. Got to go!! Xo
MtnMan, about 1 month ago
I am listening to you…