At last count, I had six ex-boyfriends on Facebook. This was not meant to happen. I was meant to dump these people/be dumped, and never see them again. Do you know how many of these guys I have told “No, I don’t think we should friends.”? (Yeah, I know, I’m a bitch.) I mean, once you’ve gone through the different stages of a relationship like “We should hang out”, to “I like you”, to “I love you”, to “Maybe we just need space,” and finally to “Get the hell away from me, you random nut-job”, how do you take a step back? You can’t. You have to start the whole thing again. And why would I begin something that I know will end in shit and tears three months later? How do you sit there and virtually smile, when you can remember every horrible thing you ever said to them, every gut wrenching thing they said to you, and how you swore to yourself the next time you saw them you would kick them in the nuts?
I like to think that I’ve evolved emotionally over the last ten years or so, that I can look life in the eye and say “So whad’ya got bitch? Throw it at me.” But the terrible thing about life, is that it likes to fuck you up. It waits until you’re nice and cushy and emotionally safe and WHAM! Some cock invents Facebook and everyone you ever shagged is poking you. Sigh. Maybe I should change my name.
xstephens, 5 months ago
Oh what a tangled WEB we weave…sorry had to say it. I think it is possible to be overly connected and therefore haunted by those we thought we’d rid ourselves of. A product of the modern age perhaps. Nice piece..well said.
LeislEgan in reply to xstephens’s comment, 5 months ago
Yes, the modern age is a bitch. There is no hiding. Even as I was typing it I was thinking OMG! What if they happen to read this! Then I figured, Feck it, they are already aware of what a nutjob I am. There is a reason we are no longer together.
Dave Legere, 5 months ago
hahaha the best bet, or at least for me, and this experience comes from just having gone to the bar and made a new “facebook friend” is to really stop caring. It’s just easier if you take solace in family/friends and view everything else as “ehh, kinda fun, kinda not.” Dating is only good if you need an emotional kick in the ass for some good writing.
LeislEgan in reply to Dave Legere’s comment, 5 months ago
Oh I know, I’m not viewing this as a dating experience, merely just the past coming back to haunt me for my misdemeanours kind of a thing. The brill thing about Facebook is just how lazy it can make you, especially the poke application. It’s like “I want to contact you, but I can’t be bothered writing a message, posting on your wall or even calling. so here’s a poke to let you know I’m thinking of you.” It’s pretty grouse.
Conrad Stryker, 5 months ago
That’s half the reason THIS guy has yet to register for either Facebook or Myspace. Fuck the past. It’s better thought of less as prologue than as parable, so far as I’m concerned.