LeislEgan

I admit it. I like to pose. I am one of those people that practise expressions in the mirror and write Oscar acceptance speeches even though I can’t act. It’s an art in itself. But airport posing? I have that down pat.

You start by getting to the airport two hours before a domestic flight with a fuckload more baggage than you need for a day and a half trip to your mum’s place. Then you head to the bar, but make sure you order the most expensive beer, because at airports they chuck ten bucks onto the normal retail price, and you need to let your fellow travellers know how much you can afford airport fares. Never mind that your jeans are held up by last years nylon stockings, you could be a rockstar for all they know.

Then you pull out the laptop and sit at the bar, facing outwards so people can see you-just like I am now in fact!

Assume an important expression, hell, raise an eyebrow if you can. (This is where practising infront of the mirror comes in handy.) Type furiously into your e-journal, blogg, or Facebook page. These people don’t know what you’re doing! You could be supervising a merger between two giant business type conglomerates! Just type furiously!

Then make an exaggerated movement of looking at your watch. Gasp. Go pale. Scream if you want. Slam your laptop shut, swig the rest of your beer and make a dash.

People will look at eachother significantly and raise their eyebrows (if they can, a concerned shaking of the head is acceptable at this stage), they’ll reflect inwardly at how busy you are, but won’t be concerned enough to bring it to the attention of the person they are sitting with.

Congratulations. You’ve just successfully completed your pose.