My Thoughts on Thinking Nothing

I’ve discovered that many people find it irritating that I ask what they’re thinking so often. I guess I would get annoyed at the question as well…and I notice this when they ask it back. Sometimes when I ask: “What are you thinking about?” I get the stupid answers that are obvious lies like…”How beautiful your blue eyes are”(My eyes are green) Or more often than never I’ll even get answers like: “My head hurts” or “I wonder why dining hall food makes me feel so sick” I suppose I like those replies better than the bullshit ones, however, I’m hoping that in their free time their thoughts have much more depth than that.
Recently, my current boyfriend told me it was time to stop asking him this question. I don’t blame him…I would ask almost 5 times every hour it seemed. It just occurred to me today that I’ve never asked someone what they were thinking this much until now. The first few times I would ask him his thoughts, he would answer me with something honest and thoughtful, almost as if to appease me. After a few days of this repeated question he told me he wasn’t thinking anything. I automatically looked at him, giving him my “I know you’re lying” face. He reassured me that he really wasn’t thinking about anything at the time. Almost disappointed, I gave up for the time being and figured I’d ask again later….and I did….again and again. Each time I asked I’d almost always get the same response. It almost shocked me that he wasn’t thinking anything. I couldn’t even fathom how a person could have no thoughts going through their mind. Last night when he told me he wanted me to stop asking, he mentioned that he didn’t want me to think that he was just an “empty shell” because he always said nothing. He said I just caught him at the wrong times. However, I’ve just realized that I didn’t catch him at the wrong times; I caught him at just the right ones. The truth is I envy his ability to think about nothing. I want to be able to relax enough to where I can clear my mind and not have so many things run through it at once.
Sometimes I find I am able to succeed in doing this if I choose one sound to listen to…like the noise from a fan or the motor of my laptop. I try to not think about the sound but just listen. Being able to do that is almost like a vacation for me and I truly wish that I had been introduced to thinking about nothing a lot sooner.

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blank, life, mature, peace and thoughts