mister khan


citizen "KHAN"s fucked up world, episode 1.

i received an application for a job i was advertiseing through the internet from a british asian- here’s an excerpt:

”....my parents are from India, I was born in England and have lived here ever since. By birth I am a Muslim, my parents decided this for me, I didn’t choose this ;) and I do not practice this. My former wife was a Christian and I believe all religions have a place in society. I visited Moscow last year and I very much like the city.
I am very serious about moving to Moscow and so I hope you will read my CV and give me an opportunity to work for you….”

how wrong is it that he has to apologise for being a muslim? is this normal. germans certainly don’t feel the need to do it.

  • LostGod

    LostGod

    oh you could have some fun with this one…which bits of the city was he looking at?

  • mister khan replied

    the gay saunas, i suspect.

  • Ange

    Ange

    that’s damn sad apologising…alright.

  • fleece

    fleece

    a jehovah’s witness apologised for waking me up into a blinding hangover. I didn’t even say anything, he just said “Oh i’m sorry” when he answered the door and backed his way (cautiously) down two flights of stairs. if you’re reading this, i apologise for not wearing underpants

  • mister khan replied

    that’s a fucking coincidence- i woke up with a blinding hangover last thursday to discover a jehovah’s witness readjusting my underwear.

    got to watch out for rohypnol roger.

  • Jacqueline Gwynne

    Jacqueline Gwynne

    Sorry I’m a lesbian.

  • mister khan replied

    if you’;re a lesbian, then i;m a woman.

  • Gregory John O'Flaherty

    Gregory John O...

    How sad… any chance of sending the job add to me ????

  • mister khan replied

    frankly, no. i only emply impressionalbe attractive young women- unless you’re one of those weird internet pervert types who is infact a young impressionable attractive girl, posing as a life-beaten man of experience, and you’re just trying to lead me on.

    fucking perverts.

  • Lawford

    Lawford

    You’re Right. I’ve not had one German apologise to me for being a muslim.

  • mister khan replied

    i had a conversation with a german the other night andf managed to skillfully thread both wars, nazis, hitler, the luftwaffe, the final solution, thge stasi, and that odd historical footnote that american fastfood is dominated by the frankfurter and the hamburger- so when kennedy stood up and said ‘ich binn ein berliner’, his home audience probably thought he was saying ‘i’m a fancy fucking hotdog, i am, you cunts’ which is why they shot him.

    the kraut didn’t apologise once for any of it…

  • STRINGER

    STRINGER

    THEY ALL SHOULD APOLOGISE!!!
    FUCKING GOAT FUCKERS!!!!

  • mister khan replied

    he who fucketh the goat fucker fucketh not the goat, but the fucker of goats, and his name is steve.

    and so it was written in the book of QUORN.

  • Gregory John O'Flaherty

    Gregory John O...

    No sorry, and I wouldn’t consider an operation just to get a job…

  • STRINGER

    STRINGER

    “I’M A FANCY FUCKING HOTDOG I AM YOU CUNTS!!!” NOW THAT IS A T-SHIRT!!!!
    ALSO PISSFARKENFUNNY!!!
    THAT GAVE ME A REAL BELLY LAUGH…
    I NEARLY SHAT.

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