Crack Between

Author: Karen Hazelwood
Word Count: 436
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Crack Between

Writing assignment starting with the weather, a no no according to Elmore Leonard’s ten rules for crime fiction, although this is not a crime.

Crack Between belongs to the following groups:

Freedom In Words & Art, Masterpieces: Literary Workshop, The Healing Journey, Up & Coming Writers, WMG and Writing Workshop

The crack of thunder chiseled through my ears, making them ring, the white from the light so intense it went beyond daylight. I looked out the window. The sun was shining. What the hell just happened? I found myself standing there with my mouth open, not understanding what had occurred. This July afternoon had kids outside laughing and playing in the street. I live on a cul-de-sac and the sky was as clear as any blue summer day, no hint of a dark cloud anywhere for as far as my eyes could see. Fear surged through me then and I turned around quickly, as if something might be standing behind me, ready to attack. I was alone. I blinked my eyes a few times and looked once more through the window. A soft warm breeze quietly floated by me and I got chills. Would voices be coming next, I wondered? Did I just have a stroke? I felt fine, my breathing was not stressed, my heart was beating normally. I stepped away from the window and turned around and felt the floor fall away, blackness surrounding me as if I were in a cave. Had I died just like that? One minute here, the next, pure darkness?

Now my heart was beating fast. That was a good sign, though I saw no others. There was nowhere to go, as if I had been entombed. My breath was shallow now. I thought my eyes were open but I couldn’t tell anymore. The world had gone. Time had been swept away and no longer did I know if I was asleep, unable to wake up, or if this was truly happening to me. I tried to clear my throat, make a noise. Nothing. I tried to move my hands, touch my face, feel anything. I couldn’t move, no sound escaped my lips. Had I been drugged, laying in some comatose state, while the world went on around me, not knowing I was lying here, waiting to be discovered? What if I stayed here forever? No one would know I was alive, needing someone to help me. If someone touched me, maybe it would all come back to me.

A white light flashed again, this time without the sound, off in my peripheral. I felt a tap on my shoulder and I jumped, taking an inhalation, as if I hadn’t been breathing at all.
“Last chance,” the voice pronounced. My eyes opened. I was standing in my room, looking through the window at the summer day in July, watching the kids playing in the street.

crowe

Enjoyed this Karen, but then again, I’m a bit of a sucker for last chance stuff. I guess this piece is capable of a number of interpretations and of course, pieces like this are very personal. It reminded me of a story I read recently, called “News from the sombre empire” by a French author Georges Duhamel. The hero attempts suicide, fails and is then transported to a sort of purgatory where an assessment is made of which way he should proceed from there. He’s injected with all sorts of serums to stop him feeling etc and his life is held up to him as he tries to justify why he ought not be sent down. Finally it is the recognition of the love of his family and the sheer stupidity of his attempted suicide that lead him back into consciousness, armed with a fresh enthusiasm for life. Life on earth can be hell if you let it I guess. Nice work.
Karen Hazelwood replied

Thanks for your response Crowe…I think this sort of thing is told a million times. When I wrote it, I didn’t know where it was going until the end, and even then, as you have said, it can be interpreted in many ways. I appreciate your insights.
Sincerely,
Karen
jcmontgomery

I think it was Douglas Adams that said, “I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be.”

I see that in what you said about not knowing exactly where you were going until the end.

And I echo Crowe’s compliment: Nice work!
Karen Hazelwood replied

Thanks JC. I like the things Douglas Adams has to say and yes, I think even when it doesn’t seem we were “supposed” to have had an experience happen to us, there is always a door that opens, no matter if we wanted it to or not. Thank you for your response.
Karen
crackedpot

The others have said it probably better than I could, so all I’ll add is – well done! I enjoy your writing immensely.
Karen Hazelwood

Thanks so much for the compliment crackedpot! I appreciate it. Writing has been surging from me lately and so whenever I feel the urge, I’ve allowed myself the time. I seem to say the same thing over and over again (I need to purge) but sometimes it takes lots of tries before it actually sinks through. I keep a watch on your work also.
Sincerely,
Karen