when the colours disappeared
for the sensory challenge
I lost my eyesight the day of the dust storm. I’d been standing in that desert for days listening for it to arrive. When the sun disappeared, we all wrapped ourselves in something comfortable. We wrapped ourselves in blankets, pain and flailing arms. A few of us choked to death, but mostly I lost the others along the way, dying of thirst.
Adjusting to the isolation and the black took time, but out there, there was nothing to bump into and the sand made landing soft, whenever I fell over. Soon, I let the feeling of the sun on my skin guide me. I knew to walk toward her after the cold night, to rest when she was beating on my head until she pushed me along from behind, caressing me over my shoulders, then down my spine, on to my legs until she left me again. I came across people in an oasis one day. I remembered how to smile and nod. I remembered how to put at ease and so it wasn’t important to understand their language and they forgave me for walking right into their held out spears. They led me to water and I can’t remember ever drinking something so pure. I drank and drank until it flowed out of my nostrils and my ears like little waterfalls back into the pond where crocodiles approached with a swift sway of their tails. Luckily one of the women pulled me back just as I heard a snap of a jaw but I became too much of a liability to the folk there, so I set back out under the open sky. That is, of course until I walked right into a wall. I should have slowed down when I felt the shadow before me, but I thought perhaps the sun had played hide and seek with a lonely cloud. You came out when you heard me scream and took me inside to clean me up. You licked the blood off my cheek and I licked the salt from under your armpit. You asked me if it was always dark and I told you not here, but that I’d been so hopelessly hopelessly lost and I missed the colour green. It was so quiet and cool inside that I felt the air rushing through my lungs again and I smiled when I heard music. It was a lovely tune and I realized it was my own voice singing it. But I swear, when I felt the whisper of your breath against my ear knowing all the words of the song, I’ve never seen anything quite so beautiful.
PJ Ryan
I drank and drank until it flowed out of my nostrils and my ears like little waterfalls back into the pond where crocodiles approached with a swift sway of their tails
so visual !!
and
You licked the blood off my cheek and I licked the salt from under your armpit.
... that took my breath away a little bit … x
Holly Ringland
oh how beautiful and lush and metaphoric is this…swoon... this darkness and deprivation is an enchanting mirage lovely girl.
sleepyeyedrar
Very good written very well
Lisa Jewell
You’ve painted colour with this my darling…..
It must be true
When one sense is not working
Other senses compensate… xxxx
DeviousLili
Beautiful, Jessica.
I should have slowed down when I felt the shadow before me, but I thought perhaps the sun had played hide and seek with a lonely cloud.
I’ll take that to sleep with me, later. Love that.
Astoreth
This is really beautiful and rich and somehow real…. what it must be like to be blind I think. xx
Jess Andrews
But I swear, when I felt the whisper of your breath against my ear knowing all the words of the song, I’ve never seen anything quite so beautiful.
It gave me tingles
Jason Moses
I agree with Jess. Last bit is so good.
I couldn’t help thinking of Lawrence of Arabia, though.
Ange
stunning jess.
bellmusker
they forgave me for walking right into their held out spears
This piece made me shiver, in so many delicate ways. Beautiful, Liebchen. x
kossimarsalsa
it’s amazing that something so far from anything i’ve been in can feel so at home. you have a way, and it’s lovely to read your work.
xx
s-a
Ushna Sardar
Awesome read Jessi! xo
berndt2
very evocative – your can feel the heat and the sand and the blindness – outstanding!
MichaelCouacaud
another great piece of poetry, Jessica.
ArcadiaTempest
I just fell over…..this writing pushed me and pulled me and then I forgot which foot to send out first and hence here I am on the floor amazed by this piece…....I am in wow right now! XXX
linaji
So glad I found your work.. incredible!
H J Higgins
I really felt that. so hopelessly hopelessly lost It just sounded so honest and bare. Missing colors and wandering. Just wonderful.
fleece
nice :)
adgray
but I became too much of a liability to the folk there, so I set back out under the open sky makes you wonder who was the truely blind ones?
Gorgeously composed like a ballet set to music in a whitened stage!
☼ Bravo! ☼