the rooster moans and the cleaning lady is left with ashes

Jessica  Tremp
Author: Jessica Tremp
Word Count: 385
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the rooster moans and the cleaning lady is left with ashes

The road stretches out onto an endless desert horizon that tugs me along, lassoos me into its unknown. I crossed the border into Mexico just over an hour ago. The windows in my car are wound down but offer me little relief from the dusty heat. My mouth resembles the dry, barren landscape you are standing in when I pull up next to you. You’re thin, like a shadow dried up in this here desolation. Your boot treads on your cigarette butt as you move towards me. My legs shift on the leather seat, unsticking themselves and I can feel your fire from here.
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We drink tequila from dirty glasses and lower them back on to a wet bar. The man behind it smirks at us and refills them. He has bad body odor and a dog he doesn’t treat well. Your hair hangs in greasy strands over your eyes and drives me crazy. My fingers itch to wipe it out of your face, then find a place to tangle themselves in it. I picture myself as a cat licking it back behind your ears until my tongue is raw and seeking your lips for healing. You sit close, pinning your eyes on me and you rarely blink. It’s making me giddy, slightly dizzy, tipsy even. But it could be just the heat. Every word we speak carries this intangible weight, that leaves me feeling exhausted as if I were learning my language entirely anew. It’s dark and there is no cool breeze. We wet our gums some more and perspire small translucent beads that drip drop off our cheeks as we shake when we laugh the way we do.
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You take me without pardon, I lay in your reins and when we slow down I read the history in your scars. The room seems caught in explosion with a staggering heat that drips off us, soaks the sheets and clouds the air. I want to drink you in. You drink from me, I can feel us drowning.
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In the morning you shave with my blunt razor and hotel soap in the shower.
You say the water is scorching you while my heart is burning, a fistful of love to the stomach.
We are moths.
The flames slave.

And we both go up in them.

  • Holly Ringland

    Holly Ringland

    goodness me jess… this is what it would feel like, isn’t it… to run away to mexico… i could taste the tequila… delicious writing. the concealed awe and love of the narrator that you observe and articulate here melts my heart.

  • Watertoy

    Watertoy

    ...and then we fly away through the darkened ashes and…..

  • mstrace

    mstrace

    WOW.

    Well, if this didn’t really happen…it sure needs to. Thats how powerfully real those words felt. Staggering stuff ms jessica…

    simply
    fucking
    staggering

  • Tate ©

    Tate ©

    yep…

  • Mel Brackstone

    Mel Brackstone

    Fabulous words, Jess! I can feel the heat!

  • deliriousgirl

    deliriousgirl

    OH JFC! I’m speechless. . .

    and drenched

  • ltruskett

    ltruskett

    I always love deliriousgirl’s comments…........hahaha…......so I will just ‘ditto’ them…..... ;)

  • aglaia b

    aglaia b

    wow, this has made me yearn the heat and i don’t even like hot weather.
    very yummy! ;-) xox

  • journey360

    journey360

    Wow Jessica, I really like this opening a lot. It is sweet:
    “The road stretches out onto an endless desert horizon that tugs me along, lassos me into its unknown.”

    Your writing is to me a treasure map leading to cascading waterfalls dripping chocolate above my muted echoes for you to “Stop it.” Most of all, I love this part it is so creamy:

    “I picture myself as a cat licking it back behind your ears until my tongue is raw and seeking your lips for healing. You sit close, pinning your eyes on me and you rarely blink. It’s making me giddy, slightly dizzy, tipsy even. But it could be just the heat.”

  • PJ Ryan

    PJ Ryan

    You take me without pardon, I lay in your reins and when we slow down I read the history in your scars

    so sexy

    Miss Tremp ~ i’d go to mexico with you.

  • Jessica Tremp replied

    hahaha, i’ll remember that

  • PJ Ryan

    PJ Ryan

    promises promises

    giggle

  • Jason Moses

    Jason Moses

    I no longer have long, tangled hair, but take me, too =)

  • Robert Knapman

    Robert Knapman

    Extraordinary…and brilliant .)

  • Michael Alesich

    Michael Alesich

    Beautifully written Jess.

    Love all the descriptions.

  • Rhana Griffin

    Rhana GriffinRedbubbley Schweppervescence

    I have a feeling if at this moment you posted “Who wants to go to Mexico with me?” there would be a stampede to your front door… One of the best peices of writing I have read here on RB. Kudo’s Jess.

  • Danny

    Danny

    With out all the superlatives..
    this is so much better than the shit I write

  • Troy Spencer

    Troy Spencer

    Great read

  • yt sumner

    yt sumner

    oh to see the words coming like liquid fire again, little moth. this is something bigger you know…xx

  • shaktipat

    shaktipat

    all i can say is ‘word.’ nice to see your stuff again – i was thinking about your writing the other day.

  • Geoff  Coleman - Landscapes

    Geoff Coleman...

    Really been missing your writing. But well worth the wait for that 3rd stanza – girl when you are on fire it burns through the page. The rest was pretty bloody good but omg that 3rd stanza – still gasping for air.

  • Luckyvegetable

    Luckyvegetable

    oh Jess, so stunning, so delicious, so painful….
    xo

  • Hayley Cafarella

    Hayley Cafarella

    Amazing! I especially love this line:
    “You take me without pardon, I lay in your reins and when we slow down I read the history in your scars.”
    Beautiful imagery :)

  • MissKristy

    MissKristy

    JEEEEZUS!

    “My fingers itch to wipe it out of your face, then find a place to tangle themselves in it. I picture myself as a cat licking it back behind your ears until my tongue is raw and seeking your lips for healing.”

    Oh…to feel that sweet cool burn….healing indeed. Exquisitie writing. Absolutely exquisite.

  • Amorous  Requiem

    Amorous Requiem

    what a beautiful writing..

  • Paul Louis Villani

    Paul Louis Vil...

    I’m so glad I’ve finally had a chance to catch up on some reading!
    I’ve been missing out.
    This is great Jess, the metaphor of us being moths and passion the flame is perfect. How natural is it that we are drawn to the desire of being wanted, desired and devoured?
    Wonderful! :)

  • H J Higgins

    H J Higgins

    Oh, the ending is gorgeous…raw and poetic. And the hair in the eyes thing…? Oh yes, yum. Something about that just lights fires :)

  • VelvetGirl

    VelvetGirl

    I love the way you write. All of it. xx

  • lazydaze

    lazydaze

    AWSOME WRITTING !! love it !! :)

  • Astoreth

    Astoreth

    i read this a long time ago and it’s still one of my faves and makes me want to be there! xx

  • ambient-1

    ambient-1

    Stunning writing!

  • Narcissus17

    Narcissus17

    utter fantasy

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