susceptability to the outcome of life

my arms are heavy
to breathe is a great effort
my neck held to one side
too many unanswers
going where?
how?
will this wait stop my heart?
who will be with me?
that last bird chirps
the choice to be alone was forced
ON ME
by someTHING absolute
-ly
unconquerable and unmoved
transparent
to begin with
who put that absolution
in charge?
Was it them, HIM, or
me?
We all know the price is too damn high for
anyone to pay.
Not even if we were to scrounge up everything we all had
together.
Could you even imagine if we tried?
Do you even understand that you have treasures YOU hold?
together with mine and theirs and His
What then, my so called friend?
this idea is too damn inconceivable
at least to us
That which is perfect has come

it’s a dumb dream
undreamt
written but untold and undesired
never a reality my bird
my burden
no hope
unconscious
writhing wit and sarcasm
my own damn defense
life never lived
what hope, not for me!
time
the locomotive with chains of responsibility wrench my throat
Who told you, you should drive?!
your coals burn in my heart
burn baby burn,

feel the burn
not time to rest
no rest for the wicked

eat my dust
filthy pig.

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