The Silent Witness

jcmontgomery
Author: jcmontgomery
Word Count: 155
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My mind struggles violently against itself. The good part, ever vigilant to what is correct, screams at me to do the right thing. However, the evil, always lurking in shadow, shows its face sporadically, beckoning me to a dark corner where morality and ethics fear to venture.

My eyes look about me, determining if anyone is about to see what I do. My hand shakes as I reach out and pick it up. Its texture and fine appearance make it evident this belongs to someone with means. Looking within, I see my assumption is correct. How easy it would be to walk away now, free from repercussions. But that voice of reason screams louder with every second – nearly deafening me with its shrillness. What is this, which makes my soul shudder, and return the wallet to its rightful owner?

It is conscience, the silent witness that watches over us all.

© 2008 J.C. Montgomery

The Silent Witness

My entry for the Flash Fiction’s first May Challenge. Inspirational Theme: Witness

I was having a hard time with this until I saw this quote by Sophocles:
There is no witness so terrible, no accuser so powerful as conscience which dwells within us.

Hence, I give you, “The Silent Witness”

The Silent Witness belongs to the following groups:

All Things Poetic, Prose, Philosophical., Flash Fiction, Graphic Scratch and Writers' Market
  • Damian

    Damian, 2 months ago

    Nice idea for the witness theme, well done.

  • Outdoors2

    Outdoors2, 2 months ago

    Depending how much is in the wallet, would determine..How far I flick the little bugger off my shoulder…ha

    Great job revealing your integrity and fitting in the theme…;)

  • bonbon3272

    bonbon3272, 2 months ago

    I like these, where you don’t know exactly what it is until the end. Nice job!

  • sssshuknowwho

    sssshuknowwho, 2 months ago

    This is a nice refreshing take on the witness theme. Well done :-)

  • jcmontgomery

    jcmontgomery in reply to Damian’s comment, 2 months ago

    Thank you very much Damian. I must admit though, if it had not been for seeing that quote from Sophocles, I would still be at a hopeless impasse…I felt inspired. From the time I found the quote to the piece as finished took merely the time to type it up. It seemly flowed from nowhere….so in all seriousness, the “idea” truly came from another.

  • jcmontgomery

    jcmontgomery in reply to Outdoors2’s comment, 2 months ago

    LOL…you are so refreshingly honest! I just want to grab that furry face of yours and give you a nice rubbing ‘round the ears. Muah!!

    And thank you!

  • jcmontgomery

    jcmontgomery in reply to bonbon3272’s comment, 2 months ago

    Funny you should note that as I thought I had given away too much information in the description field. Thank you for reading this, I glad you liked it.

  • jcmontgomery

    jcmontgomery in reply to sssshuknowwho’s comment, 2 months ago

    Well, as I told Damian, I was inspired from a quote and if you read it carefully, you will see I gleaned much from its wisdom. I can’t believe I struggled with this for so long, and that when it finally came to me, it only took minutes to finish. sigh —I guess that is what writing is all about…feast or famine…LOL….Thanks WA, I always look forward to your work, and your comments.

  • Mechellerene

    Mechellerene, 2 months ago

    You brought in me, jc…I was rooting for you (the fiction) to “let it go”, lol! These material things have such a dramatic pull on us, don’t they. It’s scary!! Great piece of writing.

  • jcmontgomery

    jcmontgomery in reply to Mechellerene’s comment, 2 months ago

    Aw, thanks Mechelle! It can be a struggle deciding between need and want, right and wrong…it is scary, but worth it when you persevere to do what is right.

  • Mechellerene

    Mechellerene, 2 months ago

    I agree. And, I think, the release is so much more beautiful, and rewarding than any material gain.

  • Alison Pearce

    Alison Pearce, 2 months ago

    Fabulous!

  • jcmontgomery

    jcmontgomery in reply to Alison Pearce’s comment, 2 months ago

    Thanks!

  • Summayyah Sadiq-Ojibara

    Summayyah Sadi..., 2 months ago

    Hmmm…JC, I see your hounds racing off in the distance! :)

    Wow! lovely piece…and quite uncanny that you should write this now, been having discussions with summayyah in the last couple of days over this same theme! And no I have not been diagnosed with Multiple personality syndome… the question I have been trying to understand is a spiritual one for me…what makes you stop…look away, walk away…run…say No..Never even when the rest of your being is screaming for satisfaction?...that is the question you just answered in part…you definitely have my vote!

  • jcmontgomery

    jcmontgomery in reply to Summayyah Sadiq-Ojibara’s comment, 2 months ago

    I hope you know now by seeing these, it is a topic over which many of us struggle. And if this has had any small part in helping you, then I am very glad.

  • Timothy Goodwin

    Timothy Goodwin, 2 months ago

    Well said, well spoken, exemplary work!!

  • jcmontgomery

    jcmontgomery in reply to Timothy Goodwin’s comment, 2 months ago

    Why thank you my good man. And for that last bit in the forum – great information, thank you for sharing it!

  • barebelly

    barebelly, 2 months ago

    JC I too have the overwhelming urge not to tempt fate, no matter how small an issue I am always honest for fear of it coming back to bite me on the bum! I would like to think that it is out of decency but like your peice describes there is always that little voice that whispers in your ear ‘Go on, take it, no-one saw!’ Hehehehe well done.

  • jcmontgomery

    jcmontgomery in reply to barebelly’s comment, 2 months ago

    Thanks barebelly. This is a great comment as it really touches upon the difficulties in knowing in your heart what is right, but understanding that the temptation to do otherwise is never far away.

    It is such a struggle sometimes, especially now, when one tries so hard to get by, and for others it seems so easy…much too easy. But this should never be a justification for throwing your ethics and self-respect out the window.

    Thanks again!

  • Zolton

    Zolton, 2 months ago

    Nice. This is a great sentiment. Did ya get a tip for returning it? (my evil side darts out for pranks then hides leaving my good side going WTF!)

  • jcmontgomery

    jcmontgomery in reply to Zolton’s comment, 2 months ago

    Unfortunately, sometimes your only reward is a clean conscience – or should I say a “quiet” one. Since I have enough problems dealing with the voices in my head, I like to keep the noise down as much as possible. LOL

  • Miri

    Miri, 2 months ago

    aren’t you good :-)!! like the take on ‘witness’

  • jcmontgomery

    jcmontgomery in reply to Miri’s comment, 2 months ago

    I try. Thanks.

  • bchrisdesigns

    bchrisdesigns, 2 months ago

    Very well written piece! Sometimes, presenting such an opinion through fiction comes off as preachy, but not in this case! It definitely works! Great read!

  • jcmontgomery

    jcmontgomery in reply to bchrisdesigns’s comment, 2 months ago

    Thank you bc, I’ve read your work, and so appreciate your feedback a great deal. And I agree, putting an opinion into one’s work can be akin to walking a tightrope – more so than a thin line. Much more frought with peril, for if you stumble, the result can be very painful.

    Thanks again!

  • zaffokioko

    zaffokioko, 2 months ago

    Very well written…I like it a lot…at first I didn’t get it (takes me a while..lol) but after I read a couple more times..I understood it.. =]

  • jcmontgomery

    jcmontgomery in reply to zaffokioko’s comment, 2 months ago

    Why thank you Kioko! It is a different kind of story, but I am glad it worked its way into your heart. Oh, I saw your photographs….beautiful!!

  • zaffokioko

    zaffokioko, 2 months ago

    thank you =]

  • incaalpaca

    incaalpaca, 2 months ago

    excellent piece JC, it is curious how simply you designed a chapter on the conscience and delivered it deftly and successfully.

  • jcmontgomery

    jcmontgomery in reply to incaalpaca’s comment, 2 months ago

    Thank you. Nice to see you made it over to the bubble. As a flash fiction piece, it is necessary to be succinct when telling the story one wishes to tell. Sometimes much can be said in a few words as well as it could said in many. This is a very nice compliment. and again, welcome!

  • incaalpaca

    incaalpaca, 2 months ago

    you are welcome JCM and for the past few months I have been working on keeping articles under 500 words and closer to 350 so as not to be rambling and allowing the reader to think and I learned a new technique from reading your piece so God bless wee lady and keep on smiling.

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