helene ruiz

How dare I
I who have nothing
Even to consider thinking
that I…me…who has nothing
a pauper compared to their royalty
I who doesn’t dress in the newest designer fashion
whose hair is …

just some thoughts

I am a clock, a time bomb, ...from the first moment i took a breath i felt the tick tock of the clock….there was a time in my life i was sweet, a time i was bitter and now a time …

well…..when the gesso dries…..i will go and paint it out, like i told someone else earlier…some sort it out, i paint it out…...think it is almost "time"........

beautiful guitar
i bathe u in the water
so u are now no more good
i will be safe that way
and
no more music teacher!
the music plays
not from your strings
but in my heart
i will just d…

Tears
fall
from my eyes
and
roll
down my face
i lick my
lips
to catch
the taste
of
my
tears
cant let em fall
may need em
for the next time…

1965 helene….childhood memories

a child
outside
all alone
NOONE HEARS ME!!!! OPEN THE DOOR!!
don’t leave me out here with this horrible man in the hat!!
so scared
voice gone
nightmare
please
go away now….

1965 h…

Babies wake to no breakfast, no kiss, no milk, while their mommies sleep in sheets made of silk..
still tryin to lose that maternal fat..
all along forgetting who they are, where they’re at …

woke up ths mornin’
scrambled an egg…
looked at it n said….well damn…here’s a perfect pic
this is me!!
an
egg
...
gathered
scrambled
never
eaten
just
a scrambled
e
g
g
. …

WHAT IS IT U HEAR?
WHAT IS YOUR ADDRESS?
WHAT IS IT SAID ABOUT?
WHAT IS YOUR ADDRESS?

WHAT DO I HEAR?????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!????
WTF DO U MEAN? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!?????
…

Here I am…I sit…now…..again…..so ALONE…...within expectations…although so overcrowded with reality…here I am….now….again….
Here I am…..now….again…
surrounded. bounde…