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Acrylic on canvas board…Its 4 am ,,,, A wasting grief, a slow bleeding of the soul…My room is so quiet and empty it hurts to hear its echoes……is anyone there?

Cup of coffee
2, 3 maybe 8 cigarettes
Conversations with myself
Knowin what I would want to hear if someone other than me said it
but cannot even reply to my own conversation
Not an answer
Not a clue
Don’t know
Do know
Peekin behind my shoulder to look at that fuckin clock

Lightin another cigarette
Damn, gonna have to get to the store
need more cigarettes
Its only 9 am and a full pack is
Go to brush the coffee and nicotine off my teeth
damn, tube is almost empty
I squeeze it and squeeze it
a little comes out
Guess I gotta buy more of that too
I feel like this empty tube
Look in the mirror
Well, damn shows
it all shows
Fuck it
My hair is what it is
Put on my shoes
Out the door
Light another
the last one
Tryin to focus on the things around me, the trees, the sky, the
Like it will stop my thoughts
doesn’t even make an impression
can’t clear my head
of anything
born fucked
been fucked
am fucked
all I can think of
damn, i love my grandchildren
they are the

Helene Ruiz was born January 15, 1958 in New York City. She has exhibited and curated numerous shows and is the founder of The Urban Individualists, an international artists collective.

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  • Isa Rodriguez
    Isa Rodriguezabout 5 years ago

    omg……… exquisite hurt……… so beautifully rendered.

  • how im feelin today….thnx isa xox

    – helene ruiz

    BLACK-CROWNabout 5 years ago

    very nice

  • thanks

    – helene ruiz

  • LisaBeth
    LisaBethabout 5 years ago

    excellent work! well depicted .

  • thnx!

    – helene ruiz

  • Valerie Anne Kelly
    Valerie Anne K...about 5 years ago

    Enchanting creativity sweetheART love it – inst fave ;} happy hippy hugglez

  • xox

    – helene ruiz

  • linaji
    linajiabout 5 years ago

    Helene…that shoulder has two voices… the one on the left,,, the one you just wrote bout and painted. My god Helene, what an incredible piece and the words are dripping with the fear of I = nothing
    and the other one who knows who we reallly are!
    You so nailed this. xxxooo

  • xox

    – helene ruiz

  • MissingYou
    MissingYouabout 5 years ago

    oh my…how this just tears at the heart…I so feel this…and know this feel:)

  • xox

    – helene ruiz

  • Kendra Taber
    Kendra Taberabout 5 years ago

    very powerful…

  • thx

    – helene ruiz

  • eoconnor
    eoconnorabout 5 years ago

    wow Helen this is so heart filled with sad emotion .the poem profound saddness very touching I hope this is catharticas it is speaking loudly !LIZ

  • thank u liz

    – helene ruiz

  • RaOrEmraeh
    RaOrEmraehabout 5 years ago

    Absolutely incredible art. I can feel it, deeply.

  • thnx so much cassidy…

    – helene ruiz

  • Sally Omar
    Sally Omarabout 5 years ago

    Helene, Your art exhibits what we all feel at one time or another in our lives…
    this is an amazing piece!!!!!!!! xoxoxoxoxoxo

  • thnx sally

    – helene ruiz

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