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Dear Daddy

OK…I woke up really early…cannot stop this mind of mine….thinking, analyzing..re-thinking, re-analyzing….As I have gotten older and wiser, I recall things I have heard, quotes from the past…and when you said to me a very loooooong time ago…I believe before my first child was born actually " Beware of those who do not dance" well…i had taken those words in the literal sense at the time, and never really understood what “exactly” you may have meant…lots of things you said to me come back in spurts when i encounter different situations or circumstances or listen to people .. etc……and each day now those words about not dancing ring back to me more and more often…“beware of those who do not dance”, did you mean…beware of those with no rhythm of the heart, or no heart, no soul, no feeling, no drummer? they do not have a heart that dances because they cannot feel the rhythm of life’s emotions? they are empty, that disconnected, that un-moved? if someone is empty and lacks feelings, or is so disconnected no matter how much they try and act as tho they feel, really will not and cannot dance…they have no heart, no beating inside, no drummer within…so they seek it from outside and suck it from others in envy and perhaps not even knowingly..they just want to know what it is to feel…so they will rob you of your inner “drummer” or damage your drummers beat by breaking the sticks or the drum…it takes time to repair damage…but if we really listen…and hear no drum within someone’s soul, then we must “beware”.. it amazes me everytime i always find new meaning in your words after so many years…I guess this is what it is all about…this living experience…those without their inner drummer become more apparently empty when you really listen to their sound of “empty”….the sound of “empty” is hollow and cold…it may even echo back over and over with silent noise…so yes….another day…I am so very thankful to have had a father like you, who was so wise and left me with memories that will always teach me till i die…I love you daddy… and I miss your presence so much…but i know you are here…cuz you always make sure i re-listen to things i missed when i was younger….wow…i miss you… now it all makes more sense see here

love from your daughter, Helene

Journal Comments

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