This was the end of the road, but my dreams continued uncaring of the silent engine…

As I wandered through darkness, faces swum in and out of my vision. The only face that I could keep in focus was that of a strangely solemn looking clown. He’s mouth twitched at the edges and then proceeded to speak, only I could not make out what he was saying. Frustrated I lent forward trying to hear. Slowly his words became audible.
“Excuse me miss,” he spoke softly.
“Can I help you?” I questioned.
“It’s time to wake up,” The clown continued as if he had not heard.
Wake up? How strange.
“This is the end of the line,” He said reaching out a gloved hand to squeeze my arm.
Feeling uneasy I tried to pull away.
“Miss. Miss wake up.” He was shaking me now. “Miss!”

My eyes flew open. The face of an ageing man was looking at me with concern.
“Sorry to wake you, but I was hopping to get going home.” He smiled.
Disorientated, I rubbed my eyes. “Where am I?”
“Bronty Beach. Did you miss your stop?”
“No, no I’m meant to be meeting my auntie here,” I quickly lied.
He turned to look out the bus window, then looking back at me. “I can’t see anyone out there,” He said jerking his thumb in the direction of the window.
“She will be here soon,” I countered confidently.
“Well if you say so,” He smiled again. It was a strange smile, though it seemed friendly enough there was something unnerving about it.
“Thanks for err… waking me up,” I said grabbing my backpack.
“You’re welcome,” he chuckled.
Getting off the bus I was shocked by the coldness of the sea air. It ate right thought my flimsy jacket. I was glad to remember the warm jumper I had picked up at the last minute, as I walked out of the house unnoticed. As I bent down to get it from my backpack I heard an engine start and the bus drove away. So I was alone. I looked towards the sea. As the last rays of sunlight faded slowly into darkness, it struck me that running away wasn’t going to solve anything. Shivering from the cold, I pulled on my jumper. Feeling a little warmer I followed the concrete path that lead to the beach. The place was deserted no one wanted to be outside in this weather. The sky was a blanket of dark grey clouds. Mercilessly the wind continued to bite at my cheeks and my nose was numb from the cold. Bowing my head I walked on till my feet sunk into the sand.
Walking parallel with the water I thought about my family, my mum, dad and two younger brothers. I was so sick of all of them. Only a few hours ago my sole desire was to get away from them. I needed to be away from the yelling of my parents and the trivial fights of my brothers. I knew there were money problems and that times were getting tough, but shouldn’t this be a reason to become closer instead of falling apart? Not thinking about the water I must have wandered closer, because my feet were all of a sudden icy cold. I looked down just in time to see the wave retreating back into the ocean. So maybe this wasn’t the smartest plan. Here I was cold, wet, scared and with no place to sleep. Really what did I plan to gain? I hated to admit it, but I wanted attention. A 12 year old still needed love and care. Didn’t she?
Yes this was a mistake. I was sure of this now, but I was too scared to go in search for a payphone in the darkness. Instead I found shelter, where a door was indented into the side wall of the beach kiosk. Sheltered slightly from the wind I sat on the cold concrete shivering.

I heard a gasp. For a moment I had forgotten everything about last night.
“Oh my! What is a little girl like you doing sleeping out here?”
I look up seeing the rather large figure of a woman. I tried to smile but instead I looked at her with fear.
“I wont bite I promise,” She smiled and suddenly I felt safe. “I come in; I will make you some hot chocolate. Would you like that?” I nodded shyly.
“Well you better get up so I can open the door.” I gingerly eased myself up from the concrete. My body felt very strange as if it had not been used for years. It was rigid with cold.
“Have you been out here all night?” Again all I could manage was a nod. “Oh you poor thing!” She exclaimed slightly worried. The door opened and I followed her into the inside of the kiosk. She gestured for me to sit down and gave me a big wooly jumper that she happened to have with her. I pulled it on and dragged a chair nearer to the heater which had just been turned on.
“So let me see where to start?” She questioned herself, “How about with your name?” Handing me a hot cup of Milo she added. “Does that sound reasonable?”
I nodded and finally found my voice “I’m Jess,”
“Nice to meet you Jess. My name’s Lucinda.”
“Lucinda…that’s a pretty name.”
“Why thank you,” She smiled. But then became serious. “Jess, why is it that I found outside? Do you have a home, a family?
I looked down at my shoes ashamed. “Yes.”
“Why weren’t you at home then?”
“I ran away.” Saying it out loud made me feel stupid for doing such a thing.
“Oh I see,” she said softly. “Is there a reason you did that?”
Yesterday I could have told this woman several reasons. But today they all seemed so inadequate. Then it all spilled out.
“I needed to get away from all the noise. I can’t stand my parents yelling at each other. Dad keeps saying that he should leave because he knows that’s what mum wants. Then mum tells him that she loves him and only him and the mistakes she has made mean nothing…” Before I knew it I was sobbing. Lucinda came over picking me up off the chair and pulled me into her embrace. For awhile we just stayed like that.
When my sobs dried away she bent down and looked at me, “How about we call your parents? They are going to be worried sick about you.” I looked up into her kind face and smiled.
“Okay.” I knew I was ready to go home.