Table Manners

ENaLu
Author: ENaLu
Word Count: 335
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I made a list
of preferred seating
today
so PLEASE read it over carefully
and get back to me with any
changes as
time is of the essence

Okay, SO far there’s ‘Under-developed Emotional Presence’
on your right beside ‘Sheer Mind Numbing Boredom’
then of course directly opposite I’ve placed your dear
friend, ‘Who Gives a Shit Anyway, We’re All Gonna Die!’
with, for your amusement, ‘I Only Came Here For The Booze
And To Say Highly Provocative Inappropriate Things Because
I Enjoy Making People Feel Uncomfortable’

Gosh remember how well that worked at last years Charity Gala?!!!

Not sure where to put ’ Just Farted’ as of yet, probably beside ’ Drenched
in Expensive French Perfume That Will Make You Gag’ now that could work?
Though the combination may prove to be volatile!

Then there’s ‘I’ve Slept With Everyone In The Room And Have My Eye On The Young Waiter’ on your right with ’ The Devil Wears Prada’ and ‘I’ve Got a Lovely Bunch of Coconuts!’’ because they seem to really get things happening every time they get together!

And finally I thought ‘Mumble Fascinating Stories Under the Breath’ could sit at the head of the table, then everyone can have the benefit of missing out!

Only fair considering how upset ’ Don’t Know Why They Bother Inviting Me To These Wretched Dinner Parties No One Gives a Hoot About Me Anyway’
got at our last Summer Ball leaving with ‘Cause a Scene And Knock Over The Punch Bowl On The Way Out for Effect’ Hey we definitely don’t wanna go there again this year!

It seems that ‘I’ve Been Everywhere Man’ can’t make it so his spot could go to
’ I’ve Never Been to Me’, depending on how well things go at Rehab.

Let me know what you think,

ASAP

Yours

‘If This Job Didn’t Pay So Well I Would Tell You To
Sticky Date Your Pudding Where The Sun Don’t Shine!

Table Manners

Table Manners belongs to the following groups:

Something To Say
  • JenniferB

    JenniferB, 2 months ago

    hahaha… absolutelyfuckingfantesticle!

    POW!(erful)

  • Judith Oppenheimer

    Judith Oppenhe..., 2 months ago

    simply brilliant!

  • ENaLu

    ENaLu in reply to JenniferB’s comment, 2 months ago

    Aint it just!!!! LOL made me laugh myself wet !!!
    thanks JB!

  • ltruskett

    ltruskett, 2 months ago

    Love, know all about, got out of it….......lolololol. Is this your new gig…........... ????

  • ENaLu

    ENaLu in reply to Judith Oppenheimer’s comment, 2 months ago

    HAhahahahaa not sure where this came from judith!
    woke up this morning after a bunch of strange dreams
    and this tumbled out! thanks :)))))

  • ENaLu

    ENaLu in reply to ltruskett’s comment, 2 months ago

    a metaphor for how to please those personalities whether they be inside or outside I guess! thanks Linda

  • JenniferB

    JenniferB, 2 months ago

    _a metaphor for how to please those personalities whether they be inside or outside I guess! _

    wow… your comment just inspired this awesome imagery that I want to paint called ‘Personalites on a Plate’ – it kinda fits your poem too!!! :-)

  • ENaLu

    ENaLu in reply to JenniferB’s comment, 2 months ago

    hey I REALLY love that! “Personalities on a Plate!!”
    that sounds SO right….I’m getting a bunch or images sparking too!
    :D

  • JenniferB

    JenniferB, 2 months ago

    hehehe, your images will hit the screen before mine do… I’m such a procrastinator! :-)

    but maybe we could collaborate and merge the two pics down the track some time? that’s if you don’t mind eating left over, cold personalities and scraps. ;-)

  • ENaLu

    ENaLu in reply to JenniferB’s comment, 2 months ago

    don’t be to sure about that! i haven’t done any NEW image in awhile
    though just last night I was thinking I need to get back into it again….would love to collaborate and have a play….

  • JakkiO

    JakkiO, 2 months ago

    Fabulous! : D

  • flower68

    flower68, 2 months ago

    LMAO!!!Too funny kooky baby!!:-Dthanks x

  • ENaLu

    ENaLu in reply to flower68’s comment, 2 months ago

    gawd! I loved writing this , so cool that you had a whopper laugh !!!
    xox love ya petal head

  • Roy barry

    Roy barry, 2 months ago

    I laughed so hard, a little bit of wee escaped!!

    Genius!

    Didn’t see “Get hammered and be sick at the table” though-should I be looking under it?

  • ENaLu

    ENaLu, 2 months ago

    ooooochie well yes that may have been me at the Business Dinner last night at the Local Town Hall!!!! thanks Roy :P

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