Acrylic on Canvas

Fish Eye

I could feel his heart beat,
From several feet away….
Ba boom,
Ba boom
His head down
as if he had been caught
Like a kid taking candy from a drug store.

He didn’t know what I was about to say
but, it was easy to see,
He didn’t want to know.

It wasn’t bad
I heard the words screaming in my head…
It’s all so simple!!

I hadn’t had an affair
I didn’t sell his favorite chair
I didn’t crash the car…..

I just wanted to talk
Talk about life,
Talk about the garbage for God’s sake….

About why we couldn’t find it in us,
to talk about anything.

It used to be easy…..
And it doesn’t seem that long ago.
We took long drives…
We talked for hours…
We sat on beaches cuddled
In each others arms.
We stared at the waves
And talked about nothing
For hours……
And it was wonderful……

But his head stayed down……
finally,
when I asked him to look at me
I saw it
that glazed,
dead pan
look
He was giving me the fish eye
For a second I felt angry….
Hurt,
Frustrated beyond words.
What happened to us?
But then………
With out even knowing why
I started to laugh
It came out of every corner of my being
tears, rolling down my cheeks,

How funny,
that this tough
grown man
was afraid
or at least it seemed
AFRAID
of me…..
Oh dear…….

So I made a vow,
To be softer,
To be easier with my approach,
To let go of anger before I talk
About ANYTHING……
So far……
It seems to be working,
It’s been a long time
Since I’ve seen the Fish eye!!