It is interesting just how much we can learn about ourselves from the world of animals. I think of an angry old dog I once met. The kind that looks at you like he’s a person and lets you know that he’s angry just for suggesting that he should trust you long enough to pet him. We are much like this after being hurt; we want love but are scared to accept it. You can get him to stop barking and maybe even sit still for a second but if you try to get closer, he jumps back, never trusting your good intent. “Calm down we say….good dog.” only to have him look at you with the same longing and begging eyes that come to mind when thinking of those anxious hearts scared to believe that God loves them or that new friend or lover. His look says many things. It says, “I want so badly to be touched, so badly to be loved, so badly to experience the joy that comes with all those things but you can also see his doubting. He is thinking of those others that came that close only to give him pain….anguish, heart-ache and all those things we can’t bear.
You know you can’t hold it against him; but get frustrated just the same that he won’t trust you & all you can do is continue to love; not coming to close; not walking away but just being patient as he accepts the idea of experiencing love again, and the anxiety that comes with the idea of letting his walls decay. Through this you must speak quietly of your goals to give the affection he cannot risk accepting quite yet.
We often think that we are being rejected; that are love isn’t good enough. Or we begin to blame him and think, “he’s just a mean ole dog.” But no one has given him a chance, I mean given him a real chance, in so long. As God alone can do, continually reassuring us, continually giving us the encouraging words to draw us closer; never condemning. Because although He is there to give us love, He never forgets that He came for us and not himself. He can be patient, He will keep calling to us; waiting for us to come close enough to feel His touch, however brief. You can see it in the dog’s eyes and in our step; the excitement at the concept of a loving soul to come close to us again. Speaking in the language of our youth. A language so calming…yet coming at such an awkward time….cause we just ‘got our wall built;’ we just became ‘ok’ with our aloneness. If no one gets close than no one can hurt me and yet we all know the opposite to be true.
That puppy came close enough to touch his nose to my hand today. Close enough to let himself go back to being a puppy…crouching, growling and wagging his tail. Running close and dashing away; like puppies love to do. He…for a moment, forgot that he was angry, forgot that he had been hurt, forgot that ‘he couldn’t trust me’…… and it felt so good.
dimitri nicoli jansen
oscarelizondo
Seems like you took the time to study the mind of the creature you describe. You are very observant it seems like you have suffered along side this dog. You saw through his eyes, you felt through his heart, and you spook for him through his mouth. A lot of feelings seem to run through both of you, is this a pet or one you wish you had. Just a question of interest because this dog does need someone, hope it’s you that can give him or her that piece of mind.
dimitrijansen
he actually was a dog that lived close by me in tennessee a few years back. He wasn’t mean but he acted like it…..he was just angy. And I really think it irritated him because I would sit there for long periods of time insisting that he come to me. What was funny was that all he had to do most of the time was act mean for a second and people just left him alone. He could handle that, he liked being left alone. But literally after hours and hours and over days and weeks I got him to trust again. thank you for your comment it means a great deal to me. I have shared many of those feelings.