Planet Editing
I’ve just launched a new website for one of my businesses called Planet Editing. We specialize in English editing and proofreading of academic articles for journal publication. If you know any one with this kind of need or could create a link from your own website, I’d appreciate it.
Thanks
A funny email doing the traps.
Dear Employees,
Due to the current financial situation caused by the slowdown in the economy, Management has decided to implement a scheme to put workers of 40 years of age and above on early retirement. This scheme will be known as RAPE (Retire Aged People Early).
Persons selected to be RAPED can apply to management to be considered for the SHAFT scheme (Special Help After Forced Termination). Per…
Pissed it away so fast
How’s my 9 year old daughter taking to singing whatever I’m playing in the car or she’s heard on the radio. A year ago, I had this old Jimmy Buffet number reworked by Jack Johnson playing in the car, she’d heard it so many times before long she was singing:
“But I’ve done my share of smugglin’,
I’ve run my share of grass,
Made enough money to buy Mia…
The Strange Machine
At my school, I run regular creative writing competitions. The students are all learning English as a foreign language. They take four hours of classes a week. Having learned Japanese and Chinese for years as well as Spanish at university and only ever reaching reasonable competency, I’m astounded by the natural flare and creativity of my students. Here is the last winner.
Interviews and Other Creepy Crawlies
After reading deliriousgirl’s superb portrayal of the creepy level of indignity that we all have to face when looking for a job, I was reminded of a character called Hugh Gallagher.
To attend NYU he had to answer the following:
3A. ESSAY: IN ORDER FOR THE ADMISSIONS STAFF OF OUR COLLEGE TO GET TO KNOW YOU, THE APPLICANT, BETTER, WE ASK THAT YOU ANSWER THE FOLLOWING QUESTION:
ARE THERE ANY …
My Father's Beer Belly Is as Fathomless as a Black Hole
I have a language school. It is a small affair with less than a 100 students.
Last week, in an advanced writing class, we were learning similes and metaphors. I usually wrack my brains for a decent one but my students are all budding Mark Twains.
Here is a little of their literary genius:
My father’s beer belly is as fathomless as a black hole.
Stanley’s brain is a blank space like th…
The Day I Met the Premier
Years ago when I was about 21 or 2, I was a trainee manager at Young and Jackson’s Hotel in Melbourne. It is a downtown hotel opposite the main railway station and a city icon. It was so famous that every politician, boxer, racing identity, country folk, movie star, gangster, street punk, and derelict would stop by there for a drink at some stage. And it was because of this reason that the …
Of Beer-Can Chicken, Friends, and the Irish
On the coast, I have friends who own a beach-house weekender. I’m a fairly frequent visitor and would be even more so if it weren’t for the fact that I have three kids and am married so that my arrival must by all reasonable measures constitute barging in, though my friends are, without fail, fabulous hosts and any sensitivity I have to the issue is purely of my own neurosis. All the same, I thin…