The eye that cries is not seen... -El ojo que llora...
…no se ve. The eye that cries is not seen…
Last night I found some writings of mine, from 5 years ago… I ended up crying, remembering how miserable I felt those days, and amazed that I was able to write those thoughts down at all…
I feel that some of those thoughts can explain some of my selfportraits… Maybe I should do something about it…
“You can’t depend on people, I know that, but I don´t quite learn it. The frustration is terrible… what’s left when one don’t depend on others? Oneself. But it’s too much weight. I’d like to lean on something. There’s God, but my connection with Him suffers from interference. I need a human hug. I’m so full of layers that divine love doesn’t touch me… I can’t feel it…”
September 2003
“No se puede depender de las personas, lo sé, pero no termino de aprehenderlo. La sensación de frustración es terrible… Qué queda cuando uno no depende de los demás? Uno mismo. Pero es mucho peso. Quisiera poder apoyarme en algo. Está Dios, pero mi conexión con Él tiene grandes interferencias. Necesito un abrazo humano. Estoy tan llena de cáscaras que el abrazo divino no me toca… No lo percibo…”
Septiembre 2003
Comments
Very deep and touching words. I am sure most of us, at one time or another, share your pain. Hopefully you have resolved these feelings since you wrote this.
Thanks deahna, yes, I’m much better in every sense…
I had also a skin disease, that was finally healed…
– Daniela M. Casalla
I am very glad to hear that! best wishes to you!
Fantastic rapture and saddness concealed within your soul @ this time…
I can tell you with certainty Daniela you’ll feel Him. It may take a while, but you will. He’s behind you to keep an eye where yoiu cannot, besides you to hold your hand, in front of you to show you the way, below you for support but never above you to make you feel oppressed or obligated. And all you need is: To Let Go as you have so beautifully expressed it your own way.
You need to keep in mind that: when you are ready He will appear, just to paraphrase “when the student is ready the teacher will appear”. A true human hug is God’s hug. And it shall happen, I know it. And I WISH it upon you.
THANKS A LOT, dear friend!
– Daniela M. Casalla
And you are again so right: the eye that cries is actually your soul that cries. Not seen, but felt. Make it the cry of happiness, as I’m sure you do most of the times.
We all need a reason why we are here and need to feel that we are loved or even lovable? People sure can let us down and when they do, it hurts far more then any desease you can think off? And while we experience such deep pain, it makes us feel abandoned and nobody cares. If God is such a God of love? Where is He when I need him?
But have we stopped for one moment, and really asked Him where He is? Who He is and what it is that would actually help us to see him? To draw close to Him and even remember to thank Him, because despite our pain and our hurt, we are here? How many blessings have we counted? That makes us glad that we are alive? Maybe if we begin to ask God these questions, the anweres are not to far away?
How heartfelt is this?! – amazingly worded – such mediterranean passion!
we have all the answers,already, we just,?need to ask the right ones,but instead, we ask little lies, we know will do, for little lies cost little,and the real answers,are,freighting,for in them,we need to work,out our self needs,alone, or if wanted, the unseen god planted in our hearts