I looks here, I looks dere,
I bin lookins everywhere.
I bin wearing these holes out in my shoes
I think I got those 8 bar blues.

I checks out limey, London town.
Gots a Hard Rock Cafe goin down.
Buts not the hard rock I once knews.
You know got the 8 bar blues.

But what’s this Crazy Horse Saloon?
They’s one in France, be dere by noon!
An dancin girls talk “voulez vous”?
Mais Madame j’ai des 8 bar blues.

Now ever bin down Buff’lo way?
Dey’s a Hooters dere, all nites’n day.
M’eyes popped at the fluff’n flooze!
But I still got the 8 bar blues.

Ah hear’d a place in Hawaii
The Zanzabar in Wakiki,
But all ma cash ah did lose.
Man I got the 8 bar blues.

Now dis has got to be the place!
The Hog’s Breath, in d’Sunshine State!
But’s jus another bad excuse,
I just can’t shake those 8 bar blues.

Now back to Fresno, it’s dere of course
Another called The Crazy Horse!
But jus some two step, two bit schmooze.
Hey dude I got the 8 bar blues.

We’s gettin jes a li’l tired outs.
Dere’s a Last Chance Saloon here abouts
Where sweet things in their 30’s cruise.
But babe I still got the 8 bar blues.

I think I finally found the spot!
Callahan’s Crosstime Saloon is Hot!
They serve all kinds, but’s still confused.
Hey!? I still gots those 8 bar blues.

These 8 bars ain’t doin me good,
So got’s me out some nails and wood,
An banged and sawed and there it stood
The bes dam bar in da neighborhood!
Now fer someone jus as smart as I,
An brags about my third eye,
I saw at last what I’s lookin for,
Now I ain’t got those 8 bar blues no more!

c. 2003