Played

Author: Damian
Word Count: 364
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Played

A little story inspired from a conversation with a friend, and a 15min writing challenge, using the words ‘tattoo’, ‘flayed’ and ‘tarot’.

Played belongs to the following groups:

Practising the Dark Arts, Pulp Noir, Short stories - Spherical Scriptings, Twisted Tales and WMG

The cards sat lifeless in his hands. The divine knowledge of the universe, the outcomes of future decisions – all blocked.

The tarot cards had been with him for as long as he could remember. A simple old Rider-Waite deck that spoke with a comfortable symbolism borne of long acquaintance. Their mere presence had been enough for him to feel their energy and open him up to prophetic visions.

A chill rippled down his back as he clutched the cards and felt nothing. His muse, his crutch; it had been taken from him. The world blurred as his eyes ran with burning tears of rage and his hand clenched around a lone card. Force of habit kept him from destroying his cherished card and he gazed down at what he held.

The Lovers.

He threw the card, finally pushed to such a desecration and cradled his head in his hands and sobbed.

He knew why. Why the cards had abandoned him, and it was his own damn fault! She had wanted the cards for a tattoo design, and he had foolishly let her use his precious cards as the models for the tattooist.

The card’s potence had bled away while being pawed at by all and sundry at the tattoo studio. The tattoos! Without the tattoos the cards would still be intact and their energy would be his. He needed to take it back, even if that meant flaying the tattooed skin from her bones. He smiled and calm returned to him as he glanced at her door, and moonlight glinted from the blade he held.

She saw him come for her. She lay in bed with widening eyes and saw his shape fill the doorway, knife extended.

He leapt forward into the darkened room and ripped the covers away, knife already in motion, arcing down to an empty bed. She was gone. He stared at the bed and his head twitched in confusion. The knife fell from numb fingers and he slumped to the floor, finally howling his frustration.

She had seen him come, hours earlier, fed by the captured power of the cards.

Lisa Jewell

Played indeed.

What a stunning piece of writing…it held me captive all the way. Such strong imagery…

Brilliant.
Damian replied

Thanks Lisa, glad you liked it :)
It felt good to write something again.
Cathie Tranent

Oooh. Fabulous!
Damian replied

Thanks Cathie :)
Krystle

Your words broke out into comic book style action in my mind. I love it when writers can make that happen :)
Damian replied

Cool Krystle! I’ve been storyboarding an image-based narrative recently, so may have an influence seeping through.
Mel Brackstone

Fantastic story, the images are so clear in my head!
Damian replied

Thanks Mel, glad you liked it :)
Holly Ringland

hey, i’ve missed your tales about the place d. i gobbled this up and i loved that the tattoos fed her tarot readings… so visual and what a pace! what a 15 min writing challenge! bravo, you :D
Damian replied

Hey Holls, thanks so much! I apparently need pressure and a rediculous time limit to get anything done :)
Rex Inkpen

ha! excellent Damien… seems like more wants to emerge from your pen..
Lawford

Nice one Damian. The power of the image is mightier than the ink? Or somesuch thing.
kiya

“Constructive criticism welcome.”
Are you serious? You don’t need the above line. The story is perfect.

Hmm.. the power of tarot? Dare I say he was “dealt” with a heavy blow. Exactly work. And congrats on the feature.
sunsette15

I like your writing, to visulaise each line in my mind, that’s what every writer should be aiming at. Loved it! Great work!
Zolton

Hi Damion! Well done. Mystical!
ArcadiaTempest

Passionate, gritty and a twist that fell right out of the tarot itself! In such a small write this conveyed so much emotion and AHHhh it was scary as well!
Alison Pearce

Wonderful!!!!!
RenataOz

Wow!!! love it! original concept…well done. XXXX
princeplace

fine but visit www.motorworld.tk and www.starred.tk and www.champion1.tk and enjoy
haileeboo2013

WOW(: YOU ARE AN AH-MAZiNGG WRiTERR!! ONE OF MY FAVORiTES FOR SURE(:
~HAiLEE(:
Pinnochio

Hi – should have been “the card’s potency had bled away”, or did you make a typo? – ain’t no such word as “potence”.
deb cole

“A simple old Rider-Waite deck that spoke with a comfortable symbolism borne of long acquaintance.” .....You rock, Damian! I love this tale and the wickedness of it and the way you turn the words into pictures!
Sarafeline

Just loved it, WOW im a captivated fan already :).x.x.x.
LoriSmaltz

Interesting playa!
aislinnTeixeira

wow. this is so awesome and definately my sort of writing. i just had to keep reading… wicked job. :P
Danielle Espin

Wow. This is fantastic.
Dave Legere

very creative!
TraceyA92

i luv it yu shud write mre.
aaeiinnn

yes write more
when you hook me to read of potential knife missuse then you are really flying as i dislike violence but love clever word pictures
celtickathy

Wow. If this was a whole book I know I wouldnt be able to put it down. Very well written.
Sidewinder

incredible… i wish i could write something like that in 15 minutes
plummerplummer

HEY THAT WAS WONDERFUL
Jason Clinton

This piece was not so grand in my opinion, but gladly you do right well. I just felt nothing flowed through me. But hey I am one guy, you got great comments here.
Keep writing, I feel you have potential. I shall keep an eye out man. all the best.
Carambooge

Great short story well done – enjoyed it very much, you should do a sequel about how the power of those cards really truly only belongs to him and through sureal twists of fate the cards seek him out and take control making him exact thier wicked revenge on those that do not appreciate or understand their true meaning. Perhaps I have read to much S King. Cheers
anaisnais 26 days ago

Great short write, love the twist – held me throughout… well done!