The Exuberance of Youth
The kids were coming. The sun hadn’t even set and he could see them filling the street, eager and excited, bouncing at the idea of bags of sugary sweets.
He didn’t mind their noise and games. We were all young once, and he treasured the exuberance of youth. A bag of sweets was a small expense to help foster the idea of trusting your neighbours. Such a thought used to go without saying, but it had nearly faded away to nothing but a distant memory.
Two young boys raced each other to his large door, panting for breath as they knocked.
‘Trick or treat!’ they yelled.
‘Treat, lads,’ he said, dipping his aged hand into the calico bag. The boys stared in anticipation at the brightly coloured candies that rained into their sacks.
They both stuffed a small handful into their mouths and crunched away, collapsing before they could take another step.
The old man slid them inside his door and dragged them one at a time down to his basement.
The machine was older than the house. He had brought it here from the old world; the one thing he prized.
With the children strapped in, the occult force powering it drained the life of the children, and soon a revitalised youth stood in the place of the old man.
He laughed to himself. ‘The exuberance of youth; a taste so sweet! I love Halloween.’
Constructive criticism welcome. © 2008 Damian Herde
Comments
sweet youthful exuberance!! well put!!
LOL, thanks :)
– Damian
Nice. Dark, and sinister. I miss the times when you heard stories like that to scare you even more when you went to knock on someone’s door for the treats. Alot better than the poisened Mars bars storys the police gave us. 7/10.. A bit short, and missing some nice details. Then again, perhaps it’s for our own imaginations to decide how he would have done it.
….
X-D
Cheers Chris, glad you liked it. Just having a bit of quick fun without getting too dark :)
– Damian
I love cautionary tales. Especially ones with occult powered machines. =)
LOL, we don’t really do the trick or treating here, so hadn’t even thought of it as a cautionary tale :)
You should see my other occult powered machine…. bwah ha haa… :)
– Damian
Love to. LOL
Oh, you got me now… LOL!
I actually did find it last night, as a story fragment while I was rumaging through story notes and ideas for NaNoWriMo (okay, I’m starting to freak out as it draws nearer…!).
– Damian
Hi Damien. I was just thinking I hadn’t seen anything from you for a while when this wee gem popped up. I like it.
Hi Matthew, I know, been a bit absentee! The day job has been running me ragged for a while, but I’m currently sitting in the eye of the storm! I’ll see what I can generate before I disappear again :)
– Damian
Don’t freak, lol. Just write. =)
LOL :)
I think spending last night in their forums wasn’t actually the positive help I’d gone looking for!
– Damian
I only visited them briefly; knew I’d get sucked in and write loads of posts, but no novel. LOL
Well, there’s that too. But I came away questioning my choice of story idea (one I’ve been thinking of for ages), thinking I’m meant to be doing something more spontaneous (hey, I’m all for spontaneity though).
– Damian
hmmm…is he in that rickety white house on the corner with the porch swing? i think I know this guy lol. nice short tale…i’d rather feel younger by eating lots of chocolate, myself ;) nice one, Damian
LOL, thanks darkest :)
Lots of chocolate works for me too. Or chocolate coating… LOL!
– Damian
loved it! Nothing quite so succulent as essence of youth. mwhahaha
Heheh, thanks! Essence of youth goes well with steak and a nice red :)
– Damian
Yeah, I know. I’m considering using my Kitrel and their genjara having a future adventure (maybe while trying to raise a kitling or three?) because I like those characters so much. Or maybe jumping waaaay ahead in the Huntress series and making one of those titles into a 50k work. Or, or….well, shit. We’ll see what happens come Nov. 1st when I actually make a start on it. I do have that werewolf pack running around.
Ooh, or I could bring Selwyn and Bleddyn back for a full adventure that takes place after those two shorts I wrote on’em.
That would be fun.
Decisions, decisions.
The rules state that as long as you start from scratch (not counting outlines/character descrips), you can work on a previous idea. Just don’t use anything you’ve already written.
I don’t like to plan that much (gee, big surprise, huh?). I threw out last years’ outline, characters and notes to start with a first line.
It worked out. =)
So many options for you! And they all sound good :)
My previous idea is one I started a few years ago, wrote a few chapters, but stopped cos my writing was rubbish. Put it on hold while I practiced with short stories. So it would need to be rewritten, but it just feels like it’s hovering in grey areas…
But I’ve got another couple of story ideas that need writing as well. One horror and the other sci-fi. Or I could just run with something completely different…
– Damian