Treasures

The case tumbled from sleep-fumbled fingers. It found the doorframe with a smash, spreading its contents through two rooms. Flashes of colour and memory flying through the air, each one taking you to a different time in your past.

Your favourite school projects from over the years, given to Mum and Dad with a beaming smile. Kept safe for you, to show how much they love you.

Mementos of your first loves, both puppy and physical. Both remembered with dreamy eyes.

Memories caught up in funny stones, dries leaves, shells and worn down pencils. Things that still seem amazing.

The sight of them brings it all back, all at once, and your head spins, swims and smiles.

You stop, and breathe, and swear.

You grab the case and look at it. Not only is the lock broken, but a hinge as well. You suddenly realise how long you have had it. Shaking the thought you crouch down and start to gather your memories, but don’t know where to start. What is most important? What will you miss more?

The fire is so hot. You know you need to go now, but your plan to save all that is special to you is strewn across the floor. You’d cry but you haven’t the time.

Then you see it. The strongest memory. You reach down and grab it and flee out the door.

Outside, you watch your life burn, but hold your special memory in your hand.


Craig Mowat

Treasures by

An entry to the Twisted Tales Star Twister – ‘Treasured Childhood Memories’

What is your treasure?

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Comments

  • Rebecca Livesey
    Rebecca Liveseyalmost 4 years ago

    this touched me even though it is about something quite horrible, i would hate to lose everything like that…but l loved the imagery & wondered myself what i would save :-)

  • I had this question in my head, you know, for dinner party discussion. I never brought it up though, never knew what to take. I think I’ll just follow Robyn’s advice, she has the experience to learn by.

    – Craig Mowat

  • Damian
    Damianalmost 4 years ago

    Good angle on the theme! You just had me looking around wondering what I’d be looking for too :)

  • That was the aim. To get you thinking. Thanks for reading.

    – Craig Mowat

  • Robyn Stewart
    Robyn Stewartalmost 4 years ago

    Been there, done that, get your kids, photos and then whatever else you have time for..

  • Thought of you as this was going along. You’d have a plan by now, wouldn’t you?

    – Craig Mowat

  • Natella2020
    Natella2020almost 4 years ago

    I liked the narration of this tale as well as the concepts behind it. It’s really interesting to think about and talk about….

  • Glad you liked it.

    – Craig Mowat

  • Alison Pearce
    Alison Pearcealmost 4 years ago

    Wonderful write!!

  • Thanks Alison

    – Craig Mowat

  • filfil
    filfilalmost 4 years ago

    Really nice job, Craig! Excellent story.

  • Thanks. Really happy you enjoyed it.

    – Craig Mowat

  • Robyn Stewart
    Robyn Stewartalmost 4 years ago

    My biggest problem now would be that I have far too many photos, would have to stick to grabbing the discs instead..

  • Belinda Potbury
    Belinda Potburyalmost 4 years ago

    Aww cry I would of grabbed the box and ran

  • Just have to make sure you keep hold of it.

    – Craig Mowat

  • Bob Fox
    Bob Foxalmost 4 years ago

    Nice work! Not so common to see someone write in the third person. I liked seeing that!

    Leaving the most precious memory a mystery is a nice touch— let’s each reader visualize their own choice.

    The twist is a great surprise, gut wrenching, and really pulls the elements together. A very good read!

  • I wanted to make it the reader’s story, and using second person really helped that. And I wanted the reader to think about what is special to them. It’s good to do from time to time.

    – Craig Mowat

  • Bob Fox
    Bob Foxalmost 4 years ago

    Doing it in second person was really interesting. It is also fairly rare in a narrative. I can’t think of many (any) examples off the top of my head.