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Stagnant

Four walls . . .
The same four walls every day.
Never changing,
The same four walls greet each day.
No-one else
To relieve the sameness
No conversation
Except when the ’phone rings
No communication
Except the fax with work to be done.
Nothing changes
Change is needed for stimulaion
A new voice
Lasts only a few minutes
Postman comes
And is gone without being seen.
Stimulation required
To prevent creeping stagnation.

Four walls, no change:
All is stagnant.

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Comments

  • ear-ear
    ear-earover 4 years ago

    I hear you loud and clear Jan..such isolation is depressing and unfulfilling.!
    Excellent written words that I can empathise with..Well done Hun..xxxxxxxxx

  • While I still played tennis, I had some contact with others but, since I had to give that up, it’s reached the point where it’s become almost intolerable. My depression took a dive last year and, now, the isolation, and consequent loneliness, is mind-deadening. Thank you for your understanding, Cynthia, it’s greatly appreciated.

    – Jan Clarke

  • Natella2020
    Natella2020over 4 years ago

    I see your perspective, but for me, solitude is something I’d kill for. You’ve always got your thoughts as a refuge.

  • I’ve been sitting in these four walls for 14 years now. I used to play tennis 3 times a week and that gave contact with other peple but I had to give that up due to injury and now, the only voices I hear other than my husband’s are those of people ringinng up to book work for him or to enquire about the same. Those calls rarely last more than a few minutes Make no mistake, Natella, my solitude is absolutely essential but this isolation, and the consequent loneliness, is very hard to bear when combined with depression. Soon, I will be completely unable to drive at night and that will be a “killer” for me as I love the night very much – that is “my time”. My thoughts are no refuge as they are very “dark” and do not provide comfort or reassurance. I do not see any change in the years to come and that comes close to terrifying me. I have had an “unusual” life and am not easily frightened or worried but this does.

    – Jan Clarke

  • Natella2020
    Natella2020over 4 years ago

    I hope you find some peace and freedom from pain.

  • I fight for it every day and have no doubt I will. It’s just the length of time it will take which worries me badly at this moment.
    Thank you very much for your kind wishes, they’re much appreiated.

    – Jan Clarke

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