Hanging on to the last Mask

Hanging on to the last Mask

What would happen if we actually finally let ourselves out of the box? Let go of that last mask and find out.

I found this writing today that I did a few months ago and thought it was rather appropriate.

“Holding on to the last mask”
I find it very interesting, we do not really share the dark parts of who we are. We hide them and suffer them in silence. Even with our best friends we do not share. We may talk about if after we have survived it. However we suffer it in silence. We keep it to ourselves as if we do not want to inflict our pain on those we love. And yet they feel our pain whether we share it or not. If they really know us, it becomes obvious. Why can we not share as we are experiencing it? Is it vanity? I don’t want you to see me cry or in distress? Or is it that it is too precious a part of our soul that we cannot share it- only after the moment is passed and the walls of protection are back in place, and our soft sweet center is safe from any possible harm, even from those who love us. It is our culture as strong women we cannot let our vulnerability show. It is too painful and too scary.
And yet I wonder if we are not able to share this vulnerability can we really be shed of all of our masks? Can we be really authentic? If all we can share is our happy and positive side or aspects how can we be real with each other? No one is perfect and we know that. We know that because we all experience it in the darkness of the night. When we are alone. Sometimes it is like a blanket covering us. Protecting us from what might be- an even harder truth. I maybe safe in my own pain, it is my own reality and that in it self can be comforting.
Graphite, colored pencil and metallic watercolor on alpharag mat board, 2008
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