chasingsooz

I am officially a photographer slash artist. A Phartist or Fartist (Australian spelling).

A Fartist is rhyming slang derived from the phonetic spelling f-art-ist and bears no relationship to the actual process of farting. Therefore it must not be confused with the popular French vaudeville star whose highly entertaining pantomime consisted of music and sound effects using the expulsion of flatulence. Though, if I were nervous I am sure I could very well make a few exciting sound effects of my own.

Generally though, mine tend to be silently and deadly, especially when I am relaxed and visiting a book store. Perhaps that was a little too much information, if so – sincere apologies and please be so kind as to not follow me up the aisle.

The popular term “arty-farty” is derived from the first term Fartist and means a creative person who can try their hand at anything ie. art and photography = arty farty.

So I am a Red Bubble Fartist and I am on the journey of art and photography with my nifty Canon 40D.

My first real professional lesson was last night. We learnt all about speed and aperture. Or for the more technical photographers (deep voice) – aperture and speed.

Initially I was going to take this journey on my own but at the last minute the Captain (see previous entries on Lost at sea ) decided that photography was also his life long dream and signed up for the course.

The lesson required that we bring something interesting along to photograph. Then after this initial explanation on the use of speed and aperture (aperture and speed), we were set loose to create our displays and then rotate clockwise around the room.

I of course took ages to set up my display and so by the time I had finished wrestling with it, most of the other Fartists had already fired off a dozen or so shots. As sheer panic set in, I then proceeded to randomly select settings on my camera, hoping like hell that nobody would notice that I didn’t know what I was doing. I think I almost pulled it off ROFL.

After we left the class exhausted and beaten by the villains of speed and aperture, we dragged ourselves to a nearby coffee shop to steady our nerves and recap. The Captain (who is always on my side during stormy seas) kindly said that he thought I was the most creative in the group.

Creative??? Everyone else knew what they were doing and brought interesting items to photograph like books and tea cups and shoes. I brought a bloody vacuum cleaner and looked like a right idiot. Then as they delicately set up their perfect shots and started clicking away, I was still wrestling with the hose that kept flicking me in the face when I tried to bend it into position.

Nobody wanted to shoot my lame vacuum cleaner either. They they all lingered on the set before – the Captain’s super cool sparkly orange and silver air compressor that he cleverly placed on the over head projector. By the time I got to it, time had run out and I only got to fire off three shots. The first I had the aperture too low and let in way too much light. So I adjusted it. The second shot was rushed because the instructor was saying it was time to pack up. My third compressor shot, the last of the night was bloody brilliant. Thanks Captain :-D

As we traveled home quietly in the car, each silently reliving the night’s events, I turned to the Captain and said; “Do you know why I brought a vacuum cleaner to the class?’
He said; “No, why?”
Well, because I am on Red Bubble, I wanted to create shots that I could actually use. So I was imagining a card with a picture of a vacuum cleaner and the words: You Suck!”

:-D
Sooz
x
(c) chasingsooz 2009