‘Just dip the corners’
‘Do you want to do it?… Didn’t think so’.
’It’ll take too long to dry if its too wet that’s all I’m sayin’
‘What time we got?’
’That’s what you said the last time with the Shower Pisser’
‘That was different, I forgot the naked variable, here iron this’
‘What about the Bus Seat Snotter, nearly missed him’
‘And that was my fault how?’
‘Just sayin that’s all’
‘Yeah well enough of your ’just sayin’, unless you want to talk about the Snort Spitter?
‘Shaddup, I thought we agreed never to talk about him again’
‘Yeah well Quid Pro Quo’
’Don’t start that Latin shite . Here it’s done, now lets roll’
’And what time we got left?
‘Look, while we’re waiting, are you sure you want to get this guy?’
‘I mean he’s not the worst, he’s a finger licker, that’s it like’
’He’s a free loader finger licker, there’s a difference’
‘Yeah well if we do him this time, I’m definitely doin the Red light cyclist next’
‘Ok Ok now shaddup, here he comes. Is it folded right?’
‘Perfect, the headline is just making me cry with pride’
‘Pride and fall, now get over there and put it on top of the others, the right pile, it’s the Daily Times remember’
‘yeah yeah cool your jets……OK done’
‘OK he’s taken it up. Jesus see what you mean, licking the shit outta that thumb’
‘Slobbers all over every page, reads the whole lot and then leaves it back on the shelf, dirty bastard’
‘Ah, so that’s why you only put the arsenic on the corners, poor bastard is licking himself to death, nice one’
‘Take a picture of him with the newspaper in his hand, make sure you can read the headline’
‘Cos its perfection. I mean c’mon, a headline that’s about us, it reads BAD HABIT KILLERS murder again, and we’re using it to murder… again’
’Yeah, see your point. Hey, whatya think about doin one of those fuckers that park in the wheelchair spots next?
Twisted Tales 86 challenge – prompt – ’He’s a finger licker’
I tried to use just dialogue to tell this one so apologies if its a bit confusing, I only had 350 words to play with :)