The comet swerved slightly as it passed near the orbit of Jupiter. Because of it’s tremendous gravitational pull, the planet changed the ballistics of the comet’s orbit just enough to make it one of those called NEO’s, Near Earth Orbit heavenly bodies. Because it was so far out, it wasn’t seen until it passed through the Asteroid Belt between Mars and Jupiter. It was first spotted by an amateur astronomer named Philip Keswick and was named Comet Keswick after that.
Scientists and astronomers examined the orbit and found that now it was a NEO. Their examination showed that it had a period of just seven years. They thought that there was no immediate danger of collision but they would be watching it closely because of it’s great size. It was found to be over thirty-five kilometers along it’s long axis.
As the comet approached Earth’s orbit, it began to exert a strange effect upon Earth.
Lewis Johnson poured a cup of the freshly brewed coffee and turned to look out the office window at the bright light in the morning sky. People found it odd to see a comet in the daytime, but this one’s great size and it’s proximity to the sun made it light up brightly, even in the daylight. Lewis was a solitary man and a no-nonsense one at that. His life was his job.
Lewis rarely had time for friends, so he was horrified when the outside of his right arm began to twitch. It jerked wildly for a moment and then was pulled toward the stomach of a young and very beautiful secretary from the office pool. She shrieked with surprise, fear and then pain as the coffee in Lewis’s hand spilled over the front of her dress.
Lewis dropped the coffee cup in shock when his arm seemed to be bonded to this young woman’s abdomen and stomach area. He tried to pull it away, but no matter how hard he tried, he was stuck to this pretty young woman. After several minutes of confusion and melee, someone called 911 and summoned help from a local hospital
Mr. Johnson and this now near-hysterical woman named Jane Dayton were unexplainably bound together. His right arm was stuck diagonally to Miss Dayton’s abdomen in a most embarrassing and personal way.
After seven hours of trying to separate the couple, the Doctors had only succeeded in fracturing Mr. Lewis’s arm. They scratched their collective heads and said that there was little more they could do other than amputating Mr. Johnson’s arm.
Meanwhile, Mr. Johnson and Miss Dayton were arguing fiercely about the incident. Neither of them wanted this to happen but were stuck with it, so to speak. They were confronted with several embarrassing situations when, after a few hours, each had to urinate in the presence of the other. They eventually laughed nervously but made the best of the situation. Finally, they had to sleep together there in the hospital.
Doctors were amazed by this phenomena and monitored it closely. By the next day, it was discovered that seven other “couples” from different places around the world had become stuck together too. It baffled scientists and doctors alike.
After nine days of this unbearable situation, the attraction between Mr. Johnson and Miss Dayton ended, abruptly. Suddenly they became unstuck, just like that. And all of the other couples became unstuck at the same time. Doctors were able to put a cast around Mr. Johnson’s fractured arm.
It took a week before Mr. Johnson worked up the nerve to ask Miss Dayton out on a date. During the week after their separation, he found that he missed her pretty face and her nervous little tinkle of a laugh. When they’d dated for several months, Lewis popped the question and they became engaged to be married.
Seven years later, the phenomena happened again. Someone in the media finally made the connection and began to call the new comet “Cupid”. The name stuck.
I am always amused when some stuffed-shirt scientist opines loudly about how much we, as humans, know about the universe.