rain
the river fills
as the rain hushes down
i am standing by the Nepean River
my wet glasses blurring
i am watching it’s wide banks swell
and stretch and try to gather me in
i feel urged to sink my feet in mud
to walk directly and without pause
into its brown embrace
it threatens, it taunts me
it knows I cannot swim
that I would soon be taken by current
and tangled in reeds
swallowed whole by my own dark sorrow
swift disintegration
meaningless and old, and quiet
all my tears forever washed clean
as my bones tumble on the river floor
finally gone from these trivial terrors
and laid, so gently, to rest
Comments
beautifully written
thankyou jess! :) what a speedy comment!
– burntblue
suicide by river? nicely done.
thankyou for reading… :)
– burntblue
That was aquatic and softly put through images of submergence, that I could picture perfectly..
Brillant..
thanks for your thoughtful comment… very glad you liked it!
– burntblue
I had to read this about 6 times, and then out loud. My interpretation is both spiritual and emotional, a kind of surrender to grief, the image of giving in to nature, kind of embracing it coming from a really powerful heart wrenching-place.. these two lines hit “all my tears forever washed clean
as my bones tumble on the river floor”. Then I am not sure if it succumbing or giving in.. not that it is my aim to interpret, as every one reads different things just that you took me to that place, with the river overflowing and that by itself it a mysterious experience
thankyou for this lovely gentle and thoughtful response. :)
– burntblue
is a mysterious captivating experience
Good use of verbs and verbals. Plangent. Nice.
thankyou so much :)
glad that an urge is fleeting in the fine line when the power of grief testing.
There’s a beautifully descriptive atmosphere in this piece,
the overflowing emotions/river tangible to my mind/senses
nice writing
Absolutely beautiful!!!!!!!!! xoxoxoxo
You have inspired me to write in my journal about a personal experience this brought back to me. The image of reeds and murky water resonates with me. I won’t post my new work in my writing section unless you feel it is appropriate. Thank you for posting this moving piece.