The waves Keep Crashing Down

So much to lose, nothing to gain,
I gave you everything, all of me,
and now its all gone,
all in the blink of an eye,
a flash of lightning,
a deadly crash of waves.
It was swept away so fast,
I never saw it coming.
I tried to stop myself,
but the waves just kept on coming.
Crashing down on me,
forcing me to say things
I never wanted to say,
things I had hoped
would never come out of my mouth,
but they kept on pouring out,
one by one,
slowly breaking apart
the one thing that I had worked on so hard.
Keeping us together had been a task,
but I had readily accepted it,
I would have done anything,
everything to keep you mine,
and I tried so very hard.
The day those waves crashed down
was the most miserable day of my life;
I knew what it meant to lose everything.
I lost it all, threw it away,
thought nothing of it,
and all because my anger was raging.
I thought id be ok, but I wasn’t,
I thought you’d be ok, but you weren’t either,
nothing is worse than knowing that when you hurt yourself,
you also hurt someone else.
I never meant to hurt either one of us,
but ended up killing both of us on the inside.
Its the worst feeling I’ve ever felt,
this feeling of something missing in my life,
in my heart, in my soul,
and that it is all my fault,
it hurts so bad,
so much,
it cuts so deep,
that it feels like it will
just rip me into pieces.
Drowning in an ocean of sorrow,
thinking of the way things used to be,
I can’t keep doing it,
every time I do,
I hurt myself again.
The waves come crashing down on me,
drowning me once again.
All of these feelings,
all of this pain,
just won’t go away,
I think they are gone,
and then they show up once more,
haunting me in my dreams
and even in my consciousness,
smothering me.
I try to block it all out,
make it stop,
but the waves just keep crashing down on me.

The waves Keep Crashing Down


Windsor, Canada

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